Music 2 My Ears - Wickedest Evil Safari

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Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:10 pm

^^^^^^^
yeah, lol then when everything goes to shit, as it always does, you could blame it on an unsent chain mail!
"ok, Miracle, we need you to go back through your emails the past few weeks and check and make sure you havent broken any chains!"

theres nothing as pleasing as answering your door to find 2 Mormons or some Jehova's Witnesses standing there, maybe some door-to-door evangelism would help spread the TWAT(s) wide open!
are these boys wearing the traditional TWAT robes?

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:27 pm

Quote:

me: Andrew?
guys?
Are you there?
5 minutes

me: Hello
Charles
I will call you soon
I have important news

TWAT: Hello am here

me: Gosh, I have been waiting
I am stredded in Benin Airport

TWAT: Yes I did not get in time

me: There was a plane problem in NY
and it seemed to carry over
My bad luck that is
I am in the airport now
I am getting a phone from someone
In about 15 minutes or so, we shall call
Are you there?
I'm in someone's office now
This is awful
Where are you?

TWAT: sorry we ran out of time credit and the information wiped out
Are u still there?
me: okay
You just bought more?
yes
This is awful
I am so tired
This is a bad trip

TWAT: Yes promised to pay tomorrow cause it late now
Where are u now?

me: Benin airport

TWAT: so
While Benin Airport
That was supposed to have been more easier meeting with you there

me: Duh
I didn't want to come to this god forsaken hell hole
it's awful
I wanna go home
But I am coming to see you
They had to make an emergency landing

TWAT: When did your flight scheduled to reach Chad?

me: I don't even remember anymore
I am so scatterbrained
It was supposed to be today some time

TWAT: Waooo

me: Huh?
What is "waooo"

TWAT: I know it was not very easy with you in the journey
it must have been a stressful one
We hope nothing happened to you or any of the passengers on board

me: No
I am fine
But man, I was so hungry

TWAT: ok

me: I had to go for like four hours without food
Sitting on the runway

TWAT: Try get something eat cause, its very important

me: Yes
I have some bad news
I ate your cake
I got so hungry
It had only been like an hour
But I started panicing
I just ate the cake
I was stuffing my face

TWAT: Thats not a problem

me: Thanks for understanding
I started going mad on the plane

TWAT: Seen you alone cause for happiness in our mist

me: I am so excited about seeing you
I a bit worried about all of this cash I have with me

TWAT: oh thanks be to God

me: I left it with the customs officials though
SO no worries
They were very nice
They said they would hold it in their office for me

TWAT: ok

me: The people here can be very nice

TWAT: Till when are you proceeding to Chad?

me: Soon
We are going to talk about this on the phone
We are going to arrange something to get me there
How close is your house to the airport?
I mean, your house in benin

TWAT: Do you mean our house here in Chad or in Benin?

me: Benin

TWAT: Ok
We are not in Benin now

me: I understand that

TWAT: I believed you will get to our house if you want from here

me: Yes
How close is it
I may need a place to sleep

TWAT: We can go to our house with you from here

me: I am a missionary/pastor, not a hobo
I cannot be sleeping in airports

TWAT: Who will receive you when we are with our house keys here with
us

me: Can I break a window or something

TWAT: Just go to any Hotel Close by and lodge
Novotel Hotel is good

me: Are you near your phone?
We are getting ready to call
I just got a phone from an official

TWAT: Yes but you have to call in 45munite from now so that we get back
to house ok

me: I cannot call you now?

TWAT: to be comfortable to answer the call

me: You don't have a phone?

TWAT: We are in a public place now

me: I need to talk now

TWAT: No

me: I am borrowing a phone
I have to call now

TWAT: 45ms

me: You can talk in a public place

TWAT: pls

me: I cannot
I need to call right now

TWAT: Security consious is very important

me: I have to call now

TWAT: We are closing to go to house now

me: Answer the phone
No
We are calling
THis is it
Please
This is the only time I can call

TWAT: I will anwer you but will not go into detailed to talk
Call

me: calling

TWAT: ok

me: Is your phone on?
We are trying to call
I am on the phone with William and Eric

TWAT: ok call

me: What's the number again
is it ringing?

TWAT: XXXXX827

me: It is ringing on our end
Pick up

TWAT: or 94 20 280
We are going to house now so you can call 30munite
Buy

me: no
I have to call right this second

TWAT: call I am waiting

The call will be up shortly. Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 Mar 2006 Posts: 7103 Location: Yes

No cake!?! This is beyond hash -- you evil people you. Evil or Very Mad

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:39 pm

Godspower FREAKED!!

We just talked to them for like 45 minutes. I'm trying too edit it right now, but it might be too large of a file in the end to send to putfile.

YW as Physme, and myself as Eric, tried to dismiss him from the church completely and send him home. Jojo as Benjamin decided to give him one more chance.

Edit: I guess what we really did was try to have Charles dismiss him for us. Now that he's a Reverend, he'll need to step up and handle things like this from time to time. Smile

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:52 pm

Quote:

We just talked to them for like 45 minutes. I'm trying too edit it right now, but it might be too large of a file in the end to send to putfile.

@PSS - Can you chop it into several pieces? (I don't know how to do that so can't offer to do it, sorry)

That chat was great, love the fact they couldn't talk "in a public place"

Can't wait to hear that call, sounds quite eventfull!

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:56 pm

Quote:

I didn't want to come to this god forsaken hell hole
it's awful
I wanna go home

I admire your honesty Very Happy

Isn't it the place where the lads live? Rolling Eyes

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:58 pm

Darnit! I have no computer access all weekend and things are heating up here Evil or Very Mad

Oh well, I'll be looking forward to reading the book on Monday Twisted Evil

Adamu's soulmate Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 337

I dont like the twats tone one little bit - how dare they disrespect Dover after all hes been through..that poor man has had a nightmare of a journey and they want to take his call in comfort Evil or Very Mad

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

Those TWATs were pretty disrespectful in chatting with Dover. I'm not sure why they wanted you to wait 45 minutes to call though. Their refusal to pick up the phone should warrant some type of slap.

I can't believe you ate the cake. Then again, going four hours without eating can be pretty painful. I'm surprised you weren't forced into cannabilism. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 9:16 pm

PSnS, lmao, one day soon, i bet Godspower will wish he had just gone home when he had the chance.

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 9:22 pm

Still editing. Confused

I messed up the slice at the end. 20 more minutes and the call will be posted. It takes ten minutes just to edit the export. Long call.

Elite Baiter Joined: 03 Jan 2006 Posts: 1455

Professor So And So wrote:

YW as Physme, and myself as Eric, tried to dismiss him from the church completely and send him home. Jojo as Benjamin decided to give him one more chance.

Classic! You threatened to send him home? How evil!!!

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:01 pm

Quote:

Edit: I guess what we really did was try to have Charles dismiss him for us. Now that he's a Reverend, he'll need to step up and handle things like this from time to time.

I hope there's some boxer

involved

Not quite a Newb Joined: 01 Jun 2008 Posts: 29

Come on.. come on.. 59 minutes now.. we are in hash conditions waiting for this call. We are stredded until we hear it. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:27 pm

Sorry, everyone. I have had to edit this 3 times. I have no audio on the PC I use to edit, so every I screw it up, I have to edit again/export/upload.

It's a 45 Meg file.

Hopefully the upload I'm doing right now is the last one.

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:44 pm

God, that chat was evil!

For some reason, this line tickled me:

Quote:

me: I left the money with the customs officials though
SO no worries
They were very nice
They said they would hold it in their office for me

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:46 pm

FINALLY:

http://media.putfile.com/Miracle-Andrew-Godspower-Edited

So, here is the sound of 6 people communicating over 4 timezones, and 2 continents. Phystme was a little preoccupied with the girls sent to paint his office as part of their community service to add too much to the problem solving.

Adamu's soulmate Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 337

One of the funniest calls in this very long bait - congratulations to you all...but the Ghanain twat has surely to be punished - he cant get away with treating the Revs in that way

Hello I'm New here! Joined: 09 Jul 2008 Posts: 6

Some favorites Laughing

:

Quote:

I'm stranded away from home. Can you imagine?

Quote:

I"m not a hobo

.

Quote:

"You're a gymnast? Really? Your legs are really toned.""Can you do the splits?"

Quote:

I'm tired. This is just the worst situation anyone could ever be in their entire life.

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:38 pm

I would love to be included on the TWAT junk e-mail project.

Sister Bernadette of TWAT could be modeled on my real life department's secretary, who adds useless information to every staff meeting Wink

I love listening to the pre-phone call strategy sessions too.

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:48 pm

Jayhawk wrote:

I once worked at a place that had about 1,200 people in one building. Apparently one day a cat got stuck under the hood of a car that was parked outside. Don't ask me how the cat got stuck, but it did.

So someone was nice and put out an email to everyone in the building, detailing the make and model of the car, and saying that a cat was stuck. Sounds simple enough, but within short order people started replying to "all" about the cat.

After about a dozen emails concerning the cat, addressed to the whole building, someone sent an email out saying that if he got one more email about the damn cat he was going to personally go out and strangle it. Thus followed a whole second string of emails, addressed to everyone, saying what a mean guy that person was, and it was just a helpless kitten, and blah blah blah.

I went into a meeting shortly afterwards, and when I came back an hour later there were thirty messages in my inbox, all concerning the damn cat. Shortly after that the server crashed, and IT put out an email saying that the next person that sent an email concerning the cat would be fired IMMEDIATELY!

At work an email lobbed into my inbox about a job in the Department but in another state entirely. The sender had pasted in the nationwide address code rather than just the state she was in. As a result the TO line was crowded with names and just overflowed.

Within minutes "Reply to All" emails began to appear asking to be taken off the address list - followed by shorter messages saying "Me too", "Me three", and variations thereon, and after that complaints about people hitting reply to all.

Then the official messages threatening disciplinary action began to appear, along with a message from a very angry senior officer about we shouldn't fuck up the system - which he promptly tried to recall.

Over the whole afternoon there were about 700 different emails about the original email, and my inbox crashed (as did so many others).

It was just hilarious!

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:53 pm

Just a thought - please include in the list. She's a devout Asatru believer, but someone submitted her details to TWAT as a joke, and her emails will start off plaintive and then get acrimonious as she is either ignored or handed on to different TWATs.

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:57 pm

I love Rev. Phystme Laughing

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:58 pm

I think a weekly TWAT newsletter should be made up and sent out to every lad ever TWAT baited, current prospects and lads on safari. It would certainly lend credibility to current lads on the hooks, plus lads who've left the faith (been streded before and lived to tell about it) might wonder again where they went wrong.

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 12:03 am

Dover is an ass...but kicks ass at the same time. Laughing

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