Al Queda after me now!

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Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:16 am

Which one of you took out a hit on ole John Jacob here? Has anyone gotten anything like this? I punched it into world lingo, turned it into Swedish and sent it back with the message that I couldn't understand this language and please feel free to contact me again. You would think that Al Queda could afford their own website with email capabilites instead of using gmail.

Date: Thu Jul 3 13:31:55 2008
From: Al Queda <[email protected]>
[ Add to Address Book | Block Address | Report as Spam ]
To: <undisclosed-recipients>
Subject: YOU BETTER BE MORE CAREFUL!!!

YOU BETTER BE MORE CAREFUL!!!

I want you to read this message very carefully and keep this secret with you till further notice.

It is a pity that this is how your life is going to end as soon as you don't comply. As you can see there is no need of introducing myself to you because I don't have any business with you, my duty as I am mailing you now is just to KILL/ASSASINATE you and I have to do it as I have already been paid for that. Someone you call a friend wants you dead by all means, and the person have spent a lot of money on this. The person also came to us and told me that he wants you dead and he provided us with your name, picture and other necessary information's we needed about you. So I sent my boys to track you down and they have carried out the necessary investigation needed for the operation on you, but I told them not to kill you yet that I will like to contact you and see if your life is important to you or not since their findings shows that you are an innocent person with a good heart and we could make more profit out of a double deal. So I called my client back and ask him of your email address which I didn't tell him what I wanted to do with it and he gave it to me and I am using it to contact you now. As I am writing to you now, my men has been on you right now in your state, monitoring you and they are keeping eyes on every steps you make.

Now do you want to be DEAD or ALIVE? As someone has paid us to kill you, you are to pay some fees to spare your life. And $20,000. is all you have to spend to spare your life, but first you have to pay is $10,000 into an account that I will provide for you, then I will send a tape to you containing evidence of my discussions with your friend who wanted you dead, when the tape gets to you, you will pay the balance of $10,000. I won't entertain any delay in paying the balance.

If you are ready to comply with my offer, then get back to me immediately, but if you don't want to comply, then I will have to other option than to carry out my job assignment on you.

WARNING: DO NOT THINK OF CONTACTING THE POLICE, F.B.I OR EVEN TELLING ANYONE OR TRY TO SEND A COPY OF THIS TO THE POLICE, F.B.I OR ANYONE BECAUSE IF YOU DO, WE WILL KNOW. REMEMBER THAT SOMEONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL HAVE ALREADY PAID TO SEE YOU DEAD, I AM ONLY LENDERING A HELP TO YOU, FOR YOU TO LIVE AGAIN AND KNOW YOUR ENEMIES. BUT I WILL BE PUSHED TO DO WHAT I HAVE BEING PAID FOR AND I WILL EXTEND MY ASSIGNMENT TO YOUR FAMILY IF I NOTICE SOMETHING FUNNY FROM YOU.
AND DO NOT COME OUT FOR NOW ONCE IT IS 7:30PM UNTIL I MAKE OUT TIME TO SEE YOU AND GIVE YOU THE TAPE OF MY DISCUSSION WITH THE PERSON WHO WANTED YOU DEAD AFTER YOU HAVE COMPLIED WITH OUR DEMANDS.

Remember that this is my first time I turned out to be a betrayer in my job, but am doing it for a reason.

I went outside and nothing happened. Could this just be another scam attempt or have I upset someone inside the organization?
.

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:19 am

I've seen this script used by most hitman scammers. These baits are usually short but, they're a lot of fun and you get great sig lines out of them. Smile

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:21 am

It is a typical "hit lad" format. Check the Surplus letters forum as there are a bunch posted there. Several members are baiting hit lads, and I'm sure they will be along shortly to fill you in. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:29 am

The real question is if you prefer to be killed or assassinated.

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:33 am

~ sheboppe,

Checking now as this is a new one on me. Thanks

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 3:34 am

vaultdweller wrote:

The real question is if you prefer to be killed or assassinated.

Just kill me, assassinations are for sissy's. Laughing

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 4:10 am

He sounds a lot like my friend Agent West,

You'll find most of the hit lads are very stupid and very very very very lazy.

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 5:36 am

Who bets Rover detects a fresh batch of government sweeps because of this thread? Very Happy

Hey want some real fun. Report this one to the Secret Service site.

They might actually give resources on that one. Laughing

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 5:43 am

So now Al Queeda is doing killer-for-hire jobs and botching them terribly by notifying their targets, eh? Geez just when you think a psychotic bunch of international terrorists can't sink any lower. And who told them it was OK to stop saying "infidel" all the time? Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 12:41 pm

You can tell them you know they're not Al-Queida, because whenever Al-Queida emails people they are about to kill they attach a picture of an alarm clock with the caption "Your time is up." Insist that you have this on high authority.

Tell them you are suicidal and would welcome death's sweet embrace.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 1:29 pm

I'd like to see his membership card and his guerilla training certificate.

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2008 8:43 pm

al quaeda are teh poor and cannot afford rack space for their servers. Hence they must go on the beg.

If it is they or if it is not, let us keep them there.

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 12:47 am

I asked him how he could kill me if they were all the way over in Afghanistan and I was in the middle of Australia. I received a very colourful reply:

Quote:

BE WARNED!!!

YOU MUST THINK THAT I HAVE TIME TO WASTE WITH YOU, BUT YOU WILL SOON HAVE YOURSELF TO BLAME, I ONLY PITY YOUR INNOCENT FAMILY.

LIKE I TOLD YOU EARLIER, I DON’T HAVE ANY BUSINESS WITH YOU, ALL AM AFTER
IS TO KILL YOU AND I WILL NOT HESISTATE TO DO SO IF YOU DO NOT COMPLY IN
YOUR NEXT EMAIL, LET ME INFORM YOU, THE PERSON WHO PAID TO KILL YOU
IS ALREADY WAITING TO HEAR YOUR FUNERAL ANNOUNCEMENT. AM CONTACTING YOU BECAUSE OF THE PITY I HAVE FOR YOUR INNOCENT FAMILY, MY MEN ARE ALREADY AFTER YOU FOR EVERY MOVE OR STEP YOU TAKE ARE BEING MONITOR BY MY MEN.

IF IN YOUR NEXT MAIL YOU DO NOT COMPLY WITH ME I WILL ASK MY MEN TO
GIVE YOU A TRACK AND SEND YOU TO WHERE YOU BELONG.

(It was more hot pink in the email, very scary)

WE ARE WATCHING EVERY OF YOUR STEPS NOW AND YOU WILL HAVE YOURSELF TO BLAME VERY SOON IF YOU DON’T COMPLY.

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 1:14 am

Quote:

(It was more hot pink in the email, very scary)

A Technicolor death threat, that's a first! Very Happy

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 4:29 am

Well at least he is lendering you a hand. You better get sendering him back an email.

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 6:04 am

Is it OK if I take a poke or two at this guy JJJingle? I always love a good hit-mugu, and a politically-motivated pink-pride activist is just too hard to resist!

Dear Mr. Hitman;

You're going to kill me? Oh no, whatever will I do? What the... hey, is that my wife's sweater you're wearing? No that gun doesn't make your butt look fat, but you might re-think the silk scarf. Listen here Butch, if you're going to threaten me, don't do it wearing autumn colours! Forget the money. How about I just touch up those roots for you?

Ohhhh this guy sounds like fun! Very Happy

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 2:01 pm

I asked him for his terrorist ID card:

Quote:

WE ARE WATCHING EVERY OF YOUR STEPS NOW AND YOU WILL HAVE YOURSELF TO BLAME VERY SOON.

BE WARNED!!!!

(The"Be warned" bit was actually highlighted in red)

He really makes the effort to make these threatening emails look so pretty. Smile

Posted: Sat Jul 05, 2008 2:56 pm

Are you sure this isn't Agent West again?

he does the continual-stream-of-threats modality, and uses red highlighting when he is monumentally cross.

Posted: Sun Jul 06, 2008 3:13 pm

~ Obi-Wan Knievel,

Yes please have a lash at this lad. I have hit him already from 4 different accounts and have got him shut down on two already. I have sent the money to keep from being killed and when they poor lad demands proof I send him an attachment with all of the banking particulars but somehow it always turns out to be a photo of a guy with a really large penis and an orangutan flipping the bird in another. I love these hit lad guys. Go get him tiger and mess up his whole world.

Posted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 12:03 am

Thank you Triple J! I'll give him a prod and see if he wakes up for me. Very Happy

Posted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 5:22 am

I ask a simple question about how to use WU and I get this:

Quote:

ARE YOU PLAYING WITH MY INTELIGENCE? DO YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE JUST PLAYING WITH YOUR LIFE?

REMEMBER THAT WE WHERE PAID ALREADY BY SOMEONE WHO KNOWS YOU VERY WELL, TO KILLL YOU? I ONLY WANTED TO SPARE YOUR LIFE, BUT IT SEEMS THAT YOU ARE PUSHING US TO DO WHAT WE HAVE BEING PAID FOR, AND I WILL EXTEND MY ASSIGNMENT TO YOUR FAMILY IF YOU REPEATS WHAT YOU JUST DID.

WE ARE WATCHING EVERY OF YOUR STEPS NOW AND YOU WILL HAVE YOURSELF TO BLAME IF YOU REPEAT THIS.

I AM GIVING YOU 24HOURS TO SEND ME THE CORRECT DETAILS OF THE PAYMENT OR ELSE I WILL PASS OUT INTRUCTIONS TO MY MEN TO FINISH OUR ASSIGNMENT ON YOU AS THEY ARE WAITING NOW FOR MY ORDER.

DON'T THINK OF PLAYING GAMES WITH US AS YOU ARE BEING MONITORED.

BE WARNED!!!

The more angry he gets, the more colours he uses. Laughing

Posted: Mon Jul 07, 2008 6:08 am

Funny how the hitman lads always seem to be the dumbest. It's the internet equivalent of robbery at knifepoint in a way, and I often think the type of mugun doing it probably moonlight as muggers. This lad's style reminds me of "<a href="http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=128237" target="_blank" class="postlink">Don Vanuchi</a>", remember him?

Posted: Tue Jul 08, 2008 2:50 am

I am hitting this a-hole from 5 different email accounts and with you folks involved it looks like he has changed his email address from [email protected] to [email protected] ....I got the highly trained killer up to the point where the money would be sent but came up with an excuse every time. He must be so frustrated because now I am getting on his ass about having a bad attitude, yelling and no consideration at all for my problems. I am waiting for an apology on on of the baits or he will not get any money. I have asked him to send one of the highly trained killers watching me to collect the money just so I wouldn't have to make the trip and provide me with a receipt for tax purposes. I have asked him as well to have one of his men pop out of the bushes and help me fix my car so I can drive to the Western Union Station and send the money and finally have maligned his mother, father and siblings on another.