Zebras for sale! Get your Zebras!

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Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:42 pm

If she mixes up zebras and crocodiles, things could get very messy.

She has sent pix of my lovely baby tigers, and a not very horny looking rhino. No sign of my Hippogriffs though, she must be struggling there. Maybe she'll make one with MSPaint, like the unicorn! Smile

Quote:

Dear Kelly,

They are lovely, I'll have them as soon as you can wrap
and post them What about the 2 Hippogriffs that you found for
me? I'd like them all sending at once please.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 9:06 pm

Boy, she is lasting way longer than Pastor Ballas did. I hope you all get your crazy animals. How about a simple black cat? Laughing

Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:22 pm

/\/\ Only if it can surf. She will need to send me proof before I part with money.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sun Jun 29, 2008 11:06 pm

@Roy - Now that would be one special cat! I would never believe her without a picture, either. Smile

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:33 am

Kelly has taken an awfully long time to get the photo for my wyldlife magazine. In a moment of boredom I decided to take a pot shot at how long it would take it make a mock-up... puh, less than 20minutes. If she ever bothers to send me one, I'll show her this shrunken down photo was the winning entry. Wink

You snooze, you loose!

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 9:34 am

I'm very late jumping on this fun bus, I've fired off an email to it and got a reply that ignored all my questions, asked who I was, my phone number, address, life story and permission to perform a cavity search.

That's one paranoid lad...

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 7:03 pm

Blimey she's back! I thought that the lovely Kelly had dropped me when Ushas (my talking horse) kept insisting on STD test certificates for his zebra mare (well he doesn't want to catch anything!)

But who should turn up today with this one sentence email

Quote:

HAVE YOU SEEN THE PAPER WORK?

I guess she must be getting frustrated at the lack of money and is going back over her dropped clients. Ushas gets his hooves on the keyboard and replies.

Quote:

No, I had assumed that you were not interested any more.

However I am still interested in your zebra if you can get the necessary paperwork to me.

But as I send this Kelly's gmail chat button lights up so I have a little natter to her

Quote:

6:26 PM ushashorse: Kelly. This is Ushas de Montville about the zebra
6:27 PM kelly: yes
how are you?
6:28 PM ushashorse: I am fine thank you
I have just replied to your email
kelly: yes
ushashorse: your last mail to me was on the 10th June
so I assumed you were not serious
however I do still want the zebra
but I need to see the correct vaccination certificates before sending a deposit
kelly: ohh sorry
6:29 PM just that i had much work
ushashorse: I understand
kelly: so i had no time to read my emails
ushashorse: so can you send me the certificates
kelly: yes
6:30 PM i will send them asap.
via emails okay?
ushashorse: Thank you
Yes please
Viral Equine Encephalopathy and Rinderpest.
are the main ones
kelly: yes
ushashorse: I will leave you in peace now as I know you are busy
have a fine evening
6:31 PM kelly: ok
i will send all the papers by email ok

Do I get certificates? Like hell I do...

Quote:

Hello,
Am very sorry to informed you that my scanner is bad so i can't email you those Documents so what you will do is that you will just pay the Money for the Deposit and i ship you these Zebra's and as soon as you have them,then you send my balance back okay,so means you will rather be sending 1500$ deposit now and as soon as you have them,then you compete the remaining Money okay,and these Zebra's will be coming along side all the papers including a 1yr health certificate okay?
so can you send these deposit today so that the zebra's being ship out:
waiting

Slap... and a carrot. Lots of forms to fill in for escrow agreements though but it might tempt "her" into putting some woeful forgery in place for a vaccination certificate.

Quote:

Kelly

I thought I made this quite clear. No vaccination certificates, no deposit. I need to make reception arrangements here and that is impossible without the certificates which you promised me when we spoke online

To show that I am serious about this transaction I am prepared to place the deposit money in an Escrow account to be released when I receive the vaccination certificates. Is that acceptable?

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 7:26 pm

Harvey emailed her to ask why he had not received his paid for animals, last they spoke the cephies were still at the airport ... a long while back! Well, she asked for ANOTHER deposit. Hehe, so Harvey went over the expenses already paid and asked her what was going on?!

What's the responses? Two emails 3 minutes apart:

Quote:

the animals are at the pet and livestock department
here is their address ([email protected])
contact them now and introduce yourself to them .
I am waiting to read from you

Quote:

AS SOON AS THE YOU GET IN TOUCH WITH THEM, YOU WILL HAVE THEM TODAY....

Hrm... me thinks that she wants to make sure I see this TODAY. Laughing

I think I'll make here wait, after all, getting ready for the 4th of July here in the states. Wink

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 7:32 pm

you guys are still messing with Kelly? I've been moved up the ladder to the Minister of Pet and Livestock.

my zebras are in his care and will be shipped tomorrow in a temperature regulating crate. Laughing

insurance and crating was only $4,000.

stupid kelly was supposed to pay that, but she claims to have spent the $10,000 i sent her for the purchase of the zebras

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 9:05 pm

This chick is expensive!

Quote:

Hi,

I have just been attacked by a wild banshee and an infection is in my leg. Since you know all about animals I was wondering if you can sell me some ointment salve.

Thanks,
Jason

Quote:

kelly briete to me

Ohh Jason,
Am so sorry to hear that from you okay,well i will rather offer you these ointment salve for free is that ok i will just send you small so that you treat your leg there so all you will pay will be Money for the transportation because i will used DHL or Post office is that ok?
waiting

Quote:

Jason to kelly

Offering that for free is very kind of you.

How much would shipping from your country cost?

Thank you,
Jason

Quote:

kelly briete to me

well that will cost you just 300$ okay?
Do you have the Money now so that we can send it today?
waiting

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:59 pm

I am still dealing with Kelly Embarassed

obviously I am not Ministry material. After repeated attempts to pick up the money from WU, we have moved to MGram, she's asked me:

Quote:

Nice reading from you well so as i said that you will have to used Money Gram
so these is the Address you will used in sending the Money Gram is that ok:

Names:................Che Ngang Joseph Mbu.
Country:...............Cameroon.
City:.....................Littoral.
State:...................Douala.
Zip Code:..............00237
Address:...............204 Church Street Apt. 27

And, 12 hours later, I get this:

Quote:

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO MAKE THE PAYMENT TO THE ABOVE ADDRESS ANYMORE OK
JUST CHANGE THE RECEIVER'S NAMES TO NKW3NTI MIKE WHO IS MY SON
FOR I WILL BE A LITTLE BIT OCCUPIED AT WORK AND HE WILL BE THE ONE TO
DO THE TRANSACTION.
WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

I wonder why she is so busy?? And why has she moved to caps?? It's too late anyhow, I have already sent the money in the wrong name.

Posted: Tue Jul 01, 2008 11:11 pm

I'm dealing with the Manager Pet Delivery now. I like the all caps IMPORTANT type.

Quote:

SIR,
ONCE MORE THE ANIMALS WILL HAVE TO USE A KNOWN STOP PET D DELIVERY GET AS SOON AS THE MONEY IS PAID,WHAT I MEAN BY THE ANIMAL ARRIVING TODAY IS THAT I WILL PERSONALLY SEE THAT THE ANIMALS ARE PUT ON BOARD THE PLANE TO YOUR LOCATION AND I GET BACK TO YOU WITH THE DETAILS AND LATEST SHOULD BE TOMORROW THAT YOU WILL HAVE THEM.
I AM OFF WORK NOW AND READY TO DO EVERYTHING TODAY IF THE PAYMENT IS MADE.
SO DO GET BACK FOR THE ADDRESS YOU ARE TO MAKE THE PAYMENT.
WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

Apparently they missed the fact that I've been insulting Kelly. Very Happy

One more fun email before making them wait til tomorrow. Twisted Evil

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:23 am

Yay have her on chat again, I had just thought she gave up on me!

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:36 am

IN Case anyone has not received their Zebras yet

Kelly has just told me that one of her baby zebras has just dislocated her leg!
So THAT is the reason why she hasn't delivered, not because she is scamming us!

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:59 am

Well now, in the process of pressuring Harv for a special crate and insurance through that pet delivery BS where I told them to contact her since it's her job to get this underway... oh yeah, calling her a wanker to the delivery service does get their attention. Very Happy

... none-the-less, my gmail account who was seeking the lucrative photo deal get's a "are you still interested" email... I replied with glee! And BLIP, CHAT a moment later! I love this scammer! She's sooo much fun!

Quote:

7:21 PM kelly: HELLO
7:22 PM me: Hi Kelly! Good to see you again!
7:24 PM kelly: HEY!! HOW ARE YOU DOING?
7:25 PM me: Not too bad, we got the issue sent to the printers and are getting everything set for the next one. Hoping you get on the cover. Wink

7:26 PM kelly: I DO NOT SEEM TO UNDERSTAND YOU.CAN YOU PLEASE MAKE IT CLEAR TO ME?
7:27 PM me: You contacted me about the photo shoot deal, didn't you? Asking if we were still interested in the picture for the contest? The editor will be thrilled!
7:28 PM kelly: SO WHAT ARE THE PHOTOS YOU WILL NEED?
7:30 PM me: Just like in the email I sent you. Nubian Zebras dyed in animal friendly dyes in the white parts in rainbow hues, 8in by 11in 200dpi.
7:33 PM kelly: SO WHAT IS EXPECTED FROM ME AT THE MOMENET?
7:34 PM me: That's it, just the digital photo with those dimensions before the 15th to be entered into the competition for the publication funds, the information is in the email I sent you, including the award money.
7:36 PM kelly: I WILL JUST HAVE TO SEND YOU A PICTURE OF THE ZEBRAS I HAVE RIGHT?
me: That is correct, just the digital file as stipulated in the email.
7:38 PM kelly: CAN I SEND A PHOTO TOGETHER WITH ME?
me: You mean with yourself in the photo shot?
7:40 PM kelly: PERFECT
7:41 PM me: That shouldn't be a problem, as long you're a person on the wild side. Smile

7:45 PM kelly: I WILL TRY TO SEE WHAT I CAN DO ABOUT IT OK?
7:47 PM me: Excellent! I will inform my boss tomorrow that you are on the job. Hope to see your entry soon! Just a reminder, the 4th of July is an American holiday and our offices will be closed Thursday through Sunday in observance. But I will be sure to get back to you as soon as I get back into town!

Awww, she wants to be in the photo! How cool is that! Either that or she'll be sending herself by email. Confused

Too good to be true, right Kelly? Which is why you've poked at this a third time. Wink

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 1:30 am

She's given me a new line in my sig!

Quote:

JUST COME OUT STRAIGHT AND STOP BEATING BY THE BUSH, I KNOW $8000 IS A LOT OF MONEY

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 11:41 am

I was told Nkw3nti Mike is her husband.What kind of family relationship is this? Shocked

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 11:56 am

In another email she has told me he is her driver... a very complicated relationship, that's for sure.

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 5:11 pm

I got his name too, all in caps from the blinkin' delivery service. Let's see who they tell he is. Wink

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 6:19 pm

Kelly likes to chat on gmail. I saw him/her on last night (10:14 pm my time 5:14 am Eater time)

July 1, 2008

me: r u there?
Sent at 10:14 PM on Tuesday
me: I wz hopng to take wit you.
me: still wait 4 zebras
Sent at 10:20 PM on Tuesday
kelly: I AM HERE
Sent at 10:37 PM on Tuesday
kelly: YES I HAVE ZEBRAS
Sent at 10:41 PM on Tuesday
me: what's the deal on them
kelly: HOW MANY ZEBRAS DO YOU WANT?
ARE YOU THERE?
me: I am here
how many do u have?
where r u ?
kelly: FOUR
TWO MALES AND TWO FEMALES
AND HOW SOON DO YOU WANT THEM?
me: oh, that sounds good to me
me: r they tame?
kelly: OH YES !! ALL ARE
WELL TAMED
me: where r they now?
kelly: THEY ARE IN CAMEROON
me: how would they get here?
kelly: VIA A KNOWN STOP PET DELIVERY AGENT PROVIDED I HAVE YOUR FULL DELIVERY INFORMATIONS AND PHONE NUMBER
me: I am interested
train horses and think zs wouls be a nice variety to the regular training
kelly: CAN YOU PLEASE GET BACK TO ME WITH THE FOLLOWING INFORMATIONS?
me: Do they have names?
kelly: YOUR FULL NAMES..../COUNTRY....STATE..../CITY......PHONE
NUMBER......../NEAREST AIRPORT TO YOUR LOCATION........./
me: I would need to see pictures
Sent at 10:57 PM on Tuesday
kelly: I WILL ALSO LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU ARE TAKING BOTH FOUR?
me: I once bought a pig in a poke and it was a really bad deal all around
me: it would depend on the price
kelly: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT/
me: it would depend on the price?
Sent at 10:59 PM on Tuesday
kelly: $10.000 IS FOR THE FOUR INCLUDING SHIPPING TO YOUR LOCATION
me: That is a lot of money
Sent at 11:01 PM on Tuesday
me: ru there?
kelly: I KNOW BUT I WILL ALSO LIKE TO LET YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE ABOUT HAVING SOMETHING THAT IN YOUR LIFE YOU WILL NEVER REGRET YOU DID SO OK?
me: ok its late here
Sent at 11:04 PM on Tuesday
me: do the zs do okay in semiarrid climate?
kelly: YES THEY DO JUST LIKE HOPRSE
me: ok am tired have early day
me: tomorrow
kelly: THOSE THAT I AM ABOUT SENDING TO YOU ARE STILL YOUNG AND GOOD FOR TRAINING
me: can i talk to u tomorrow?
kelly: JUST EMAIL ME WITH YOUR FULL DELIVERY INFORMATIONS SO THAT I CAN PROCEED WITH THE PAPER WORKS TO YOUR NAMES OK
I WILL GET THE PICTURES TO YOU OK?
me: to get more detalis?
Sent at 11:07 PM on Tuesday
kelly: YES YOU CAN I AM ALWAYS IN THE LITTLE HURT (hut?) IN THE FARM WITH THE ANIMAL
DO YOU ONLY WANT ZEBRAS?
me: ok about the pictures
me: tomorrow ok?
kelly: I ALSO HAVE DIFFERENT ANIMALS
me: ok i'll ask what kind tomorrow
kelly: YES TOMORROW I WILL GIVE YOU THE PICTURES
me: good nite tomorrow ok?
kelly: GOOD NIGHT MY DEAR (my name is Randal... Maybe this can turn into a romance!)
Sent at 11:10 PM on Tuesday

My first chat with a scammer, but it won't be my last! Twisted Evil

Edit to get times correct.

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 6:22 pm

Quote:

I AM ALWAYS IN THE LITTLE HURT

Yurt?

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 8:17 pm

Lord N0rris sent Kelly some money via WU, but something seems to have gone wrong, sadly. Sad

Quote:

SIR I WAS INFORMED THAT THE MONEY YOUR SEC SEND IS NOT IN MY LOCATION
AND I WAS VERY EMBARRASSED. Laughing

SO YOU WILL HAVE TO COPY DOWN THE BELOW INFORMATIONS AND TAKE IT BACK TO THE WESTERN UNION BRANCH THAT THE SEC.MADE THE PAYMENT FOR CORRECTION.AFTER YOU MUST HAVE DONE WITH THE CORRECTIONS,YOU WILL HAVE TO GET BACK TO ME WITH THE AMOUNT SEND AND THE MTCN.

RECEIVER............................NKWENTI MIKE
COUNTRY..............................CAMEROON
ZIP CODE................................00237
AMOUNT..................................$4000
STATE.....................................LITTORAL
CITY........................................DOUALA
TEST QUESTION.....................FROM
TEST ANSWER.......................N0RRIS

Posted: Wed Jul 02, 2008 9:01 pm

i sent him WU secure, but he wouldn't travel to collect the money. he insisted i send it by MG Laughing

unfortunately the clerk is old and can't see too well, so the name has been wrong 3 times. i think i'll shoot for Mike Titw@nki.

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:50 pm

Expensive teeth.

Quote:

ALL YOU WILL HAVE TO PAY FOR THE TEETH'S IS JUST $3000. IF YOU ARE OK WITH THAT,PLEASE DO GET BACK FOR MORE INFORMATIONS AND PICS OF THEM.HOW SOON DO YOU WANT THEM AND WHAT FOR? I CAN SEND THEM TO YOU DHL TODAY. WAITING TO READ FROM YOU

I had specifically requested 3 white teeth, 2 rotten teeth, and 2 yellowed teeth. She got the count wrong. I believe that she's gotten the count wrong, the idiot.

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2008 7:59 pm

oh no...

Quote:

I WILL BE VERY MAD AT YOU IF YOU CAUSE MY TO LEAVE MY JOB AGAIN AND JUST FOR YOU AND FIND OUT THAT THERE IS NOTHING THERE IN THE NAME OF MONEY SEND BY A PASTOR

how will i sleep at night knowing he is mad at me?

very well, thank you Twisted Evil

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