Best insults and curses...

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Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 6:58 pm

Hi all am new here Very Happy

. I am complete NOob to scam baiting and am looking forward to playing some lads.Have read i think most stickies so much information here!!.

I have set up a mail acct for insults and curses,i was thinking that might be the best way to get my feet wet.Kinda like getting a feel for it,so was hoping you guy's and gal's can help get me started.

I know i know there are lot's spread out all over the site.But would be nice if you could post some here.And if in lad speak maybe you can give a rough explanation of the meaning.So if you would be so kind Smile

Gotta say phone lad calls i get such a kick out of...find myself throughout the day snickering and laughing,like an idiot.

So help out a NOob plz Thumbs up

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 27 Jan 2008 Posts: 589

Here are my best insult scripts if you need more pm me or thedevguy67

Quote:

HAVE NOTHING WITH A STUPID IGBO HOMOSEXUAL OF YOUR SORT

JUST LIKE YOUR UGLY AND POOR FATHER, ALL OF
YOU WILL STAND AND SEE HOW THE YORUBA WILL STAKE OVER
NIGERIA

YOU CAN NEVER DISPUTE THAT YORUBA ARE BLESSED AND THAT
YORUBA ARE THE AMERICANS OF AFRICA.

I ASSURE YOU ALL YOUR GENERATION WILL BE BASTARDS IN
NIGERIA. AND YOU WILL AGREE WITH THAT WITHOUT THE
YORUBAS NOBODY COULD KNEW THAT THERE IS A COUNTRY CALLED
NIGERIA. YORUBA IS NIGERIA.

FUCK OFF BASTARD HOMOSEXUAL. ALL IGBO WILL DIE
VERY SOON. LETS WAIT AND SEE.

YORUBA ARE THE AMERICANS OF AFRICA AND GOD IS WITH US THAT IS
WHY PROSPER IN EVERYTHING DO. CAN'T YOU SEE, you IGBO BASTARD

DEATH AWAIT YOUR GENERATION AND FAMILIES FOR CURSING
AN AFRICAN JEW. NOBODY SHOULD CURSE THE PEOPLE OF GOD
AND YOU DID. THEREFORE, YOU ARE ABOUT TO DIE AND
FOLLOWS YOUR FAMILY AND GENERATION AND THE YORUBA OR
AFRICAN JEWS WILL TAKE OVER NIGERIA.

ROAST IN HELL IGBO HOMOSEXUAL.

This one really hits a nerve with the lads Twisted Evil

Quote:

I now know that you have no iota of knowledge about who your mail meets You are such an illitrate that you cannot communicate. I am
not surprised anyway because the moment everybody in Ibo land discovered that there is a game called 419, all elderly men gathered their
children and borrowed money to send them to Lagos in order to attend Ajudua school of theifry/stealing.
You were one of them haven been given birth to by a roadside harlot for an unknown father. Of course this is a common thing in Iboland where
Emeka, a cousine can make an uncle's wife pregnant and the uncle will claim ownership of the child. You are one of them. The bad effect of
such offspring is what is manifesting in you now. Instead of running to God the almighty, you decided to give your life to juju because you
want money that will not come to you. The earth the the Lord's and the fullness thereof. Very soon, you will chew IRON.
You may think that you are on the line of prosperity, but I assure you that you this is the begining of madness on your part and because you
have mortgaged your future and that of your generation yet unborn on the alter of money, you must die this year in a miserable circumstances.
Do everything to put your house in order(IF YOU HAVE A HOUSE)this year because you must die(MISERABLY) this year 2008.
I am in England enjoying with my family while you continue to roast in your so called Lagos till you pass on to a higher furnace this year.
For your information, I just picked a cool ?87000 (Eighty-Seven Thousand Pounds Sterling) from a fool like you and I am not expected to share this amount with any idiot like you.
I leave you to wallow in penury. Very soon you will chew IRON.

Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 7:04 pm

I like to take the name and contact information for my lad of the week and add it to the bottom as a signature line for the email that goes out to about 400-500 lads a day.

Here's a script from another member, with my addition at the bottom:

Quote:

U B NA BIGEST MUMU FOR INTERNET. MUGU LIK U R SUPOSE TO B IN DE VILAGE FIRMING. GOAT FORKER IDIOOOOOOOOOOT. U R NOT SUPOSE TO EVEN HAVE BOX. U B SUCH FOOL UR MAMA TOTO SURFER FOR LABOUR FOR NOTING... MUMU FO LIFE, U GET NO FUTURE EXCEPT AS MUGUN FO EFCC.

U DEY WRIT MY MAGA MODERFORKER! I HAVE NOW PLACE U NAME AT OKIJA SHRINE N U NO EVA SEE MAGA AGAIN. OOOOOOOOOO.

WASH WASH MEANS U CLEAN UR HIV ASHAWO MONKEY MAMA TOTO B4 DEY GO WORKIN FOR ALLEN AVE. COM CARY WAT AREA BOYZ DO TO U SISTAR. FOCK UR PAPA WEN E FUCK UR BRODA NA GET KISS OF DEATH FOR BABOON GRANMOTHER STINKIN TOTO. UR MAMA AM MONKEY TOTO STINK UP ALL OF NAIJA REAL BAD.

U GO DIE AS POOR CHURCH RAT, BASTERD HE GOAT MUMU WITHOUT FUTURE, U B DISGRACE FO U VILLAGE. MAY CLIFFORD ORJI VISIT UR GENERATION.

YOURS IN SERVICE,
BAR.(DR) EWA ANTHONY (ESQ)
PRINCIPAL PARTNER
Phone:( +221-76-484 18 16 ).
Email ([email protected])

That's info another lad put on his mail to me, I just made a similar email address and tacked his signature on it. I hopes he appreciates the personal touch. Twisted Evil

Baiting Guru Joined: 03 May 2007 Posts: 18313

Everyone's missing the most important part of his post, he's read all of the stickies!!! happy crowd

Welcome here. Very Happy

I'm not much of an insult baiter, but I think you should be creative and write some of your own.
Nevermind ladspeak, just pull out the stops and write, then experiment. Have fun with it as lads are disposable. I sometimes randomly insult lads from my catcher account when I've had a bad day. It's very therapeutic.

Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 7:17 pm

I have the knack of attracting some beautufully crafted blood curdling death threats. I can't think why.

This is one of my best.

My translation is in red (probably not completely accurate) Very Happy

Quote:

I DON CARRY YOU NAME GO GIVE CELE PEOPLE
I've given your name to the fairies
THEY WILL BONE CANDLE FOR YOU HEAD. I SEND THE
and they will make a flower garland with candles for your head
NAME TO 7 PARISH AND NOW WORK DON START FOR
I've also told the parish priest and
YOUR HEAD. I NO DEY CORNER PPLE WORK NA VERY BAD
he wants to anoint your head too
THING AND E NO GOOD FOR GMEN ANYBODY WEY DEY
I also play with goblins and they aren't nice people
CORNER PPLE WORK NO DEY LAST YOU KNOW WHY BOIZ
They won't tell you first before they rush to smother you with kindness
GO QUICK KILL AM WITHOUT WASTING TIME. NOTE SAY D
so be careful to watch out for goblins
ONLY ADVISE I GET FOR U B SAY MAKE U WATCH AROUND
They're out to get you lurking round every corner
U NA UR VERY GUY DEY DO THIS KIND TIN DEM DON DO
I don't know why they'd do it to a nice guy like you
ME SO WATCH UR BACK LATER MAN. ONE BY ONE YOU
So take care - but don't worry 'cause we all die one day
GO DIE.

Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 7:27 pm

Wow. These are particularly vemomous. There are a number of things I'd be very interested to know more about, if anyone has the inside track on them.

1. Very soon you will chew IRON: sounds brutal. origins?
2. Yoruba are the Americans of Africa: Are Americans particularly admired in these parts?
3. May Clifford Orji visit your generation: Who? Why? WTF?

lots of references to sexual congress with goats, obvious and international, and comparisons with goats, etc. I think it reasonable to assume that goats are thought to be pretty crappy creatures. And lots of vulgarity towards family members, which of course is accepted in more places than a Matercard. It's the top three that interest me though. Any ideas?

I'm also particularly interested in the black magic and superstitions of the area. is there a good source for these on the interweb, or internal to the twisted innards of the Eater?

Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 8:46 pm

Fresh in during the past hour

Quote:

OGUN NA IM GO KILL UR PAPA AND UR MOTHER AND UR UNBORN CHILDREN> U GO DIE BY FIRE. OGUN GO KILL U BADLY

Beaten to death with feather dusters would have been my personal choice. Very Happy

Posted: Thu May 22, 2008 9:10 pm

oGUN IS

Sorry, just finished emailing a lad Very Happy

Ogun is the god of fire and iron, a creator and destroyer, very powerful and quick tempered. So perhaps this has a bit to do with chewing iron.

I just fired off "oku igbe" at my waster of a lad who won't get off his arse. from what i can gather it means "bush death", ie, may you die alone in the bush and have no mourners or funerary rites. I added that dogs should eat his carcass and that if he did not join my Gomer Gang i would go and light a candle on his head at Ogun shrine.

I'll see in the next few hours if I've got my curses right, I guess.

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 6:12 am

Nailgunner wrote:

I'm also particularly interested in the black magic

Cut and paste from my earlier post... Vodou is practised in West Africa, but it doesn't have anything to do with the Hollywood cliches most of us are familiar with. New baiters should read at least the Myths and misconceptions section from Wikipedia before trying any voodoo modalities; otherwise you'll just confuse your lad.

Other useful bits are Vodun cosmology bit on the West African Vodun article, and the beliefs section on the Haitian article.

Nailgunner wrote:

"3. May Clifford Orji visit your generation" ...Who?

Googling gets me this nice link: http://www.mayhem.net/Crime/cannibals1.html#nigeria

Quote:

The suspects were identified as Clifford Orji and Tahiru. The cannibal duo, who appear to be mildly retarded, allegedly dug holes on the ground for unwary passers-by to fall into, before killing them and roasting their bodies.

It is unclear how many victims the serial cannibal-couple killed and ate. Neighbors said the two killers lived under the brigde of the Airport Road for years and were suspected of murdering people to sell their body parts for rituals.

Apparently he was caught in 1999.

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 8:47 am

Lads are very often 100% fervent Christians but see no issue with resorting to juju threats and curses, and probably even accord respect to juju priests, in much the same way that Westerners have assimilated pre-Christian rites and fetivals into their version of Christianity.

It not only gives an insight into their mind set but also to our own. I don't believe that they see any problem with going to church on Sunday and using their ifa priest as well, and calling on their juju Gods to wreak havoc on their enemies.

The juju Gods tend to be more gutsy and vengeful, so that's what's most likely to be thrown at you if you get them riled.

Personally I just wind them up to collect the best threats and curses, and then throw them straight back at another Lad, and I save them up for later use - editing them together to make the Mother of all Curses.

Baiting Guru Joined: 29 Jan 2008 Posts: 2531 Location: AU

thanks sir scam alot
i just used this one on the oil lad which visited us. Mr Gomer aka 'oil lads boss' keeps taking the money when he goes quiet then sends him this sort of abuse.

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 11:47 am

'dont u know that immediately you pay the 16,157 i will use black magic against u, u can even ur house or anything to just get money and u will transfer it to me'

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 2:24 pm

Thanks this is great stuff.Strongside you have a particular knack at this Laughing

may take you up on that.Nailgunner always like how you get to the meat of the situation.Tricia thanks for the usefull links have a nice Vodoo doll to send along to selected lads!!.

Sir scam alot will certainly give that a go surely makes for some good reading i suspect Wink

Mr GOmer i get such a kick out of you using them soundboards GEORGE AGDGDGWNGO kills me.Do you just have the page open in front of you or can you download them,don't see where?

Thanks Everyone

I aspire to join the GOmer boyz

Thumbs up

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 11:12 pm

sirscamaheap - Your barrister's insult went out to a handfull of my finest checklads edit lottolads (complete with siggy block & tel). One wants to work for him Shocked

& another sent this:

Quote:

I don see all wetin u write but wetin me i get 2 tell u be say if ur mind strong email me again i go show u one level wey u and ur family no go 4get 4 una life. U just one waste urself and i assure u say ur next write up i go teach u wetin u need 2 know. I dey wait.

I think I'll tell him that if he has any balls he can call me; could use some text.

Posted: Fri May 23, 2008 11:19 pm

I'm sure that's why my lad has been busy with other things. I only got one email from him today and it was short. I wonder if he was up all night taking angry phone calls. Twisted Evil

Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 12:34 am

^cool. Your barrister is also taunting and desecrating the family (routine follow up, you know, I mean, I'm a very busy office and this is sirios businesss) of one of the most viscious mugus in my arsenal Twisted Evil

Edit: It's also been going out to some of my most pissed off mugus from the latest asem (saturday).. Hope they call!

Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 12:38 am

Excellent. Nothing better than wasting a lad's time.

Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 8:35 am

I love insults. Insults from lads are my trophies and safaris! I don't keep track of them, because after a while they all sound similar. Lots of goats, family members, body parts, and death.

What I really like is when lads insult me in English. Since I don't speak lad-ese, I'll even ask them to translate for me. Strangely, some of them do.
3 of my favourites that I can find are...

Old Maryam wrote "I CAN SEE AGAIN THAT YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A FULL WITH NOTHING OF YOUR HEAD BECAUSE YOU ARE LIER WITH NOTHING. NOW PLEASE GO MAKE THE PAYMENT AGAIN."

Rebekah the orphan said "You will always burn in hail to deceive me like this. Fire consume you and your family and there family. Idiot like you! I am now kick out of the hotel and to the street daddy but what will you help me now."

My Russian lover Lena: "Deceiver! To what porpose you have told me to wait for you??? To me you love me but now marry with a man make no sense!!! And what of your wife now? I will speak and tell her of what you do to me these year. How you are like small dog! Nose in one dirt for another. Do you like it now? Do you still want me my dear? my heart forever with yours."

Those aren't very impressive as insults go, but I love it when a lad keeps asking for money even though they're madder than dog pooping tacks.

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