Desmond and Churchill: **Calabar Confirmation**

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Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 8:48 pm

I like both of these ideas!

Douala IS very close to Calabar -- and getting him into a rough spot in Cameroon was really the plan all along. (Note to self, however - avoid Calabar for future trips!)

Douala seems very nice: "Protests Paralyse Cameroon's Capital and Port City".

I think Desmond's "Introduction Letter" is going to say something along the lines of, "Long Live President Paul Biya - I think he's a great guy..."

Posted: Thu Feb 28, 2008 8:57 pm

I'd love to see their faces as they near Douala and see the smoke rising above the city.

Posted: Mon Mar 03, 2008 9:29 pm

Gotta love it when they cluster at a pre-targeted location.

Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 5:16 pm

Churchill seems dedicated...

I am working on where to send them in Calabar - but getting photos of a place (to compare their security photos to) is proving difficult.

From Calabar I have a few tricks up my sleeve to get them into Cameroon...

Twisted Evil

Churchill to Prof. Hill

Quote:

sir,

I have tried my best to make sure that things were moving on fine right from the very day desmond told me about the Gary conservatory application.so pit me aside in your accusations. I will definitely talk to desmond and I believe there will be no problems anymore.

Remember initially that we were not doubting you not until the incidence at mauduguri airport,which the airport told us that non of the people we asked about arrived.However we demanded those things to be sure of what we are doing.Besdides,we went to abuja,benin and finally maiduguri threy were no positive result,so if you were in our shoes you will doubt also.so do not be so furious about it ,afetrall we did the sametoo.

I will be waiting for the english version of the letter of introduction from Gary conservatory.Please let us know the importance of thoose
letters.Unfotunately you said we should not show it to anyone,who then do we show it to and how do we know.

Please remember that desmond is a kid so do not respod to hia accusation the way you were doing.

I will be expecting the detail of the whole trip to calabar.You delayed everthing with your numeropus protocols that did not yield any positive result.

I will be expecting your letter soon.

Regards,

Churchill okwara.

Professor Hill to Churchill

Quote:

Churchill:

Remember that cold I told you about before? Turns out it was slightly more serious. No need getting into the details right now, but I should let you both know I just returned from the hospital - I'm afraid the natural stresses of my job, plus all the complications we keep running into getting you boys to your passports has put a bit of pressure on my heart. The doctor says I will be fine for now, but have to cut down on the ketchup soy sauce.

At any rate, I apologize if I seemed snappish before. You must understand that I am used to students paying me a certain amount of respect, and I feel I received very little from Desmond - then being told on top of that to just "calm down"....it can be very infuriating.

You should know that I gave quite the impassioned speech to the Board of International Travel yesterday as soon as I got back from the hospital and they have agreed to make new arrangements with the US Passport Office to meet you in Calabar. Some of the Board members are starting to suspect that you have questionable intentions, and have implied that my future at Gary Conservatory will be tied to getting you both back here to the US. I urge you to please not let me down. I have been the Dean at this school for quite a long time, but I feel I am beginning to quickly lose my influence over the Board, which could result in some serious issues for me later on.

I will be sending one of our international relations grad students along with the US Passport Agent to Calabar. Please note that the security requirements outlined on pages 10 and 11 of your International Travel Information Packet still apply. An updated security verification sign will be sent to you shortly. Roger will also be in charge of your (newly issued) scholarship funds in the form of a money order. You can use this money to settle any outstanding debts (hotel stay, taxi service, photo fees) etc. that you may incur on your trip.

An updated French AND English letter of introduction will be sent to you so as to identify you to the US Passport Agent in compliance of US Passport Transference laws. Again, the letter in French should be the one you should use first - but both will be made available to you.

I spoke with the Passport Office this morning about meeting somewhere that is not the Calabar airport. He informs me that if you wish to meet outside of a secured airport zone than additional security and anti-terrorist procedures will be involved. Do you still want to meet elsewhere, or will you be content to going to the Calabar Airport?

Let me know if you would prefer to meet elsewhere and I will send along the additional security requirements.

There are flights leaving Calabar regularly for London (and then to Gary, IN) - do you feel you will be ready to leave by March 19 or 20?

I am glad we are getting back on track. Please forward this e-mail on to Desmond, and you might suggest that he offer a more sincere apology to me. Whatever happened to the "other" Harold Hill that was e-mailing him, anyway? I do not appreciate him lying to me in an attempt to seem more important.

All my best,

Prof. H. Hill
Dean of Students

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 6:01 pm

Willie Nelson's "On The Road Again" keeps playing in my head, Peanut.
Good luck with your students! Very Happy

Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 6:13 pm

It's like Christmas every week with these guys, Peanut.

Speaking of Christmas, too bad it's not Christmas Carnival time in Calabar. I'd love to see your lads in these costumes.

The scary thing is they'd probably do it too. All in the name of Art!

Master Baiter Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 237

Peanut, PM me if you want a picture hunter again. I'll find you stuff for Calabar or wherever if you'd like.

ETA: I found some potentially useful stuff. I'll PM you in just a bit...but if you want it for elsewhere in addition/instead of, let me know!

Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 7:24 pm

Quote:

Willie Nelson's "On The Road Again" keeps playing in my head, Peanut.

Heeh, for me it's Johnny Cash, "I've Been Everywhere"

Quote:

For Pete's Sake
I've been everywhere, man
I've been everywhere, man
Crossed the deserts bare, man
I've breathed the mountain air, man
Travel - I've had my share, man
I've been everywhere

I've been to:
Abuja
Benin
Maiduguri
Calabar...

Posted: Wed Mar 12, 2008 10:19 pm

We're good to go. Cool

Desmond to Professor Hill

Quote:

sir,

I am sorry if I have been rude to you is just out of anger and fustration.I apologise.

mary haa insisted thta she will travel with me to calabar this time around and her comfort and shelter is my concern.I will raise the fund for the transport fare and you will book for the hotel online so that we will leave for calabar on the 19th march 2008.

Please how do we locate the matina park in calabar and how far is it from the town.Are we to locate where the anchoe is.please explain..

I will be glad if you will coperate this time around.

Desmond.

I've discovered that will e-mail you an e-itinerary before you've even paid for the ticket (complete with confirmation numbers for the lads to verify). If you don't pay withing 48 hours of booking the flight, though, the reservation is canceled...

Professor Hill to the Lads:

Quote:

Boys,

I spoke with the Travel Board today, and I am afraid it is completely out of the question to book you a hotel in advance in Calabar (I believe we have discussed this before). However, if you bring the hotel receipts to meet your student liaison I will instruct them to bring enough petty cash to cover your expenses. You will also both have your scholarship money orders, which can be cashed at any local bank there in Calabar.

Marina Park is located by the old port in the oldest part of the city, right by the banks that lead to the atlantic ocean. It is a cultural landmark, and you should have no problem finding it.

Per university policy, the tickets will be booked two days before your intended travel. So if you will be flying out on the 20th, I will forward you the flight booking information on the 18th.

Incidentally, Churchill, the double black diamonds I mentioned in February were in reference to my ski trip. I am sorry for not fully understanding you before...."double blacks" are a skiing term used to measure the difficulty of the slope. Beginner's ski down "green circles", intermediate skiiers go on "blue squares" and the difficult levels are "black diamonds" and "double black diamonds". I did have a friend take a photo of me on one of them, but unfortunately I then landed on him - breaking the camera! We were able to get another one at the ski lodge, but we decided it would be wise not to take it back up the mountain that day.

Hope everything is going well.

Prof. H. Hill
Dean of Students

Churchill to Prof. Hill

Quote:

sir,

When are the international student liason and the US passport coming to calabar or are they there already!!!

I will like you to inform me the if our flight will be leaving from Calabar International Airport or do wew have to sail to a nearby country before boarding a flight.Send the details of the flight information so that we can track it online as soon as it has been booked.

In the meantime I we see what i can do to convince Desmond and mary so that we will take off latest on 20th 0f march,since you said the school Board refused booking for our reservation online.However the school
International student liason will be coming with our scholarship money so that we can settle mary before taking off.

Please let me know every step by step process and the logistics involved for better understanding of the whole trip.

Please I hope we will not be interuppted when searching for the anchoe point by the park security men. I believe we have to show them our school and travellinbd documents if the need arises.Moreso, are you still sending tjhe translated draft version of the Gary Conservatory latter of Introduction.

Do you want to have Mary's picture sent to you as oon as we get to calabar Marina Park,I believe you will have a gift for her delivered by the school international liason student.

I will contact you if I have finished speaking to Desmond and mary rtegarding the date we are learving.bvut in the meantime I need the detailed logistics.Please do not hide anything from us,be OPEN.

Ihope to hea from you soon.

Regards,

Churchill

This is where they will be traveling:

I also got in touch with a very nice individual that has blogged about traveling around Nigeria in the past. Telling him I was writing a story in which my main character travels around Nigeria and Cameroon getting into trouble with authorities and whatnot, he promised to give me as many details about the surrounding area as he could - and also put me in touch with his brother, who lives in Calabar:

Quote:

the large anchor sits by the old port in the old part of the city, right by the banks that lead to the atlantic ocean. its located in one of the poorest portions of the city which has a ton of old buildings from the 19th century or maybe even older. i think that area was once involved in the slave trade. in an effort to revitalize the region, the former governor built a museum on slavery and built the marina park, symbolized by the anchor. he also built a wall to shield visitors from the squalor of the region. the park is well manicured, has a carousel and a restaurant. i hear, though didnt see, that crime is more rampant on the other side of the wall that divides the park from the slum. so that may be the sort of area you want to write about.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Mar 13, 2008 2:36 pm

Quote:

Please do not hide anything from us,be OPEN.

haha, Peanut. They will go, if you do not hise the truth!
Another safari for the boys, I love it! Laughing

Posted: Mon Mar 17, 2008 10:29 pm

It's the Calabar countdown!!

I have been spending most of the day today plotting out exactly what's going to go down in the next few days - if nothing else there should be some amusing photos going on.

Their "flight" is officially on Thursday, March 20 at 10PM. That's 3PM my time (CST) so I can try to keep most of this escapade within my normal work hours.

Special thanks in advance to Duckmeister and, of course, Marvinator for some special things they cooked up for me to hit these lads with once they get to Calabar.

Desmond to Prof. Hill:

Quote:

I will like to know the next move from your end any way we are almost set for the trip to calaber please once again let me know the needed things to carry along because i dont want to carry any bag apart from my bible and the document of the passport and my drumning stick's

I look to your mail ASAP.

Churchill to Prof. Hill:

Quote:

Sir,

I will be waiting forthe letter of introduction and the flight ticket information.PleaseI want it to be trackable online for authencity.

As you said earlier I wanted mary to go to calabar with us so that we can raise her some money from the scholarship fund to take care of herself and to pay all the outstanding bills.

I have however arranged with a person on her she will be taken back to lagos as soon as we board the flight. Please do we have to show any document at the Marina park for gaining entrance to the anchor point .

Please make sure the ticket information will be acceptable even by the local airport officials,the previous documents we presenteds at the maiduguri airport did not make any meaaningf to them.

How long will it take for the US passport agents to arrive after receiving the security photo.Moreso,can they allow us to pass the night at the Marina park if we get there late in the night.

I need to hear from you augently bevause desmond is bombarding me with a lot of questions regarding the trip.Please I need you to repoly my mails fast .

Inwill be glad to receive the airline ticket infortmation from you tommorrow at least to aid me in convincing desmond the more.

Regards,

Churchill Okwara.

Professor Hill to The Lads:

Quote:

Boys,

Yes, the security of the internet cafe will be your responsibility to confirm. Like the travel document suggests, take note of a few different internet cafe's in case you have to change locations.

Before you leave, please be sure to send to me your travel details. I want to know when you are leaving Lagos, how you are getting there, and where you will be staying. I have chosen to use your story as an example in the new pamphlet I am writing for all international traveling students - so the more photographs you take the better. Please provide me with accurate documentation of your trip (photos of you leaving Lagos, where you will be staying the night, speaking with any police or officials, etc). The board has already approved this project, and I will pay you boys $100.00 each for each photo depicting you trip from Lagos to Calabar.

The US Passport Agent () and your International Student Liaison () will be arriving in Calabar the morning of the 20th. Roger should be contacting you from the verification e-mail sometime Tuesday.

There should be no problem entering the park. As I understand it, is a public space. You should take the photos and send them (no later than 12PM) to *******@gmail.com for authenticity verification. I have spoken with the US Passport Office and explained the difficulties you have been through, but they informed me that this just makes it more necessary to ensure that your US Passports are handed over safely and securely. To that end, I have been asked to tell you to please be prepared to change locations or to submit a secondary security photo. If a secondary security photo is required, you will receive an e-mail from with the details. I do not know what they are, and hope you will have no problems. The best thing for us both to do is simply grit our teeth and not complain - there is nothing you or I can do to get around the , and must do our best to comply with them exactly.

Once your security photo has been approved and your location confirmed (no later than 4PM), Roger will contact me and I will send you the Letter of Introduction both in French and English. You MUST have both letters to show to any officials you meet, and to when it comes time to sign over your passports.

Tomorrow (Tuesday) will be the 18th, and first thing in the morning I will send you your confirmation flight info for your flight on the 20th out of Calabar to London.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Mon Mar 17, 2008 10:58 pm

Quote:

i dont want to carry any bag apart from my bible and the document of the passport and my drumning stick's

Desmond must have forgotten how cold he was sleeping under that tree all night on the last trip. You would think he would at least want to bring a warm sweater, or blanket this time. Laughing

Good luck with the lads, Peanut! We'll be rooting for you again! Very Happy

Master Baiter Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 237

Great way to get them to take photos! Thumbs up

I can see that working with them.

And I'm so glad they're going to Marina Park! Laughing

I love these boys...they make me laugh...without even trying. LOL

Oh, and I can't wiat to see whatever it was you alluded to about what else you had up your sleeve with them. Very Happy

Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 7:55 pm

gets in touch with the boys:

Quote:

Hey dudes!

My name is , and I'm going to be your Student Liaison on your way to the greatest school in the US - ! Woo!

I hope you guys are excited as I am to meet and greet. Professor Hill was one of my teachers back when I was an undergrad at Gary, and he's told me I am to take extra special care of you guys. Professor Hill sponsored my way into the international diplomatic program I'm involved in now, and it's been incredibly exciting.

The US Passport Agent and I will be arriving into Calabar on Thursday. Now the show is going to be run by him until AFTER you get your US Passports - then you guys are in my charge and I will be escorting you around the airport and onto the plane. I assume Professor Hill has run you through all the security procedures already, but let's review OK?

Don't stress too much about the security photo. As long as you've read the packet clearly there should be no problem. When I first came to Gary I had been in an exchange program in Iran. I had to submit 3 DIFFERENT security photos. So just relax, and go with the flow. It'll all work out.

We'll be flying - first class! The Conservatory likes to keep it's students happy, so there will be dinner served on the plane to London, and then we have a brief layover before getting on the plane to Gary.

* SEAT: 26A / GATE 3 CONFIRMATION NUMBER: AA01694G

* SEAT: 26B / GATE 3 CONFIRMATION NUMBER: AA11204Y

All travel information and questions you might have can be found on their website: (address snipped)

I've also attached some photos of me so you'll be able to recognize me (though, as you can see, I'm probably pretty hard to miss!)

Any questions you have, I would be happy to answer!

See you soon, guys.

--

International Student Liaison

Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 7:59 pm

Hurley!

Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 8:02 pm

I entertained many ideas for who would play Roger Whipple. Other close candidates were Chris Rock, Chuck Norris, and Kevin Federline.

though just seemed perfect. Very Happy

Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 9:20 pm

In Roger's care, how could your boys possibly get "Lost"?

ps Wtf is a Brule? Laughing

Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2008 9:26 pm

Indeed. That might need explanation.

When I was in college "" was my nickname. It's a long and involved story, but also rather uninteresting if you weren't there, so I'll spare you. I didn't really think this would continue much past the first leg of the bait.

I was happily mistaken!

GO FIGHTING BRULES

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Mar 19, 2008 12:40 pm

Brule Rules! Laughing

Master Baiter Joined: 01 Oct 2006 Posts: 237

Any news? Any news??

I was awaiting hearing about the birth of the daughter of good friends...and I got that update now...

The other thing I was awaiting was hearing about the crazy adventures of D&C.

I can't wait to see what you've got up your sleeve!! And of course they help the whole situation by getting themselves into scrapes even without your assistance! ha!

Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 6:39 pm

I thought perhaps they had twigged when I got no reply in my box this morning. Then this came (with a similar message to Roger):

Churchill to Prof. Hill

Quote:

Subj: We are in Calabar/sorry for the delay
sir,

It was a bitter experience.However we arrived safely at Calabar.

We were attacked by arm robbers at Onitsha city very close to Benin city,so the driver has to drive into a police station to take cover,were we spent about 3hrs waiting for the robbers to finish there operation
before we can continue our journey.Meanwhile it was a night journey and we are finally inm Calabar righjt now.

I am sorry for the delay,however explain things to my dufe rogers whipple regarding our trip.

We are about giong to the Marina Park right now to take the security photos as directed.Please kindly let me know if this internet connection is secured before I go take the photo.

regards,

churchill okwara.

Now who could have told them to take such an awful road... Twisted Evil

EDIT:

As of a few minutes ago, we have official confirmation (click for larger)!!

But the text is too small!!!!!!!!!

Churchill and "Roger" exchange some quick e-mails:

Quote:

Rogers,

This is the security photo as you directed.

The photographer was processing the film that is why I delayed,however everything is OK.

I will be waiting for your response at the cafe AS Soon AS POSSIBLE.Remember the internet cafe CLOSES BY 8PM.AND THE NEXT CAFE IS ABOUT 30 MINUTES DRIVE FROM THE MARINA rESORT and clopsesby 8;30pm.So we have tobe fast.

I am waiting for yourr urgent response.

Rergards,

Churchill Okwara.

Quote:

Dudes!

The photo will NOT be valid unless it can be read!

Do you see how the sign Churchill is holding can barely be read??

Print it out better, or go over the words (carefully) with pen! We MUST be able to see the letters.

Re-send the photo as soon as you can!!!!!!!!!

Roger
Gary Conservatory
International Student Liaison

Quote:

dude,
I complained to the printer he said it is from the scanner they used ion scanning it originally.Howevr I have to go back to check on him.

I will get back to you soon.

Churchill Okwara.

Quote:

Guys,

Agent McClain is ticked, guys. Seriously, fix this problem as soon as you can and send in a clearer photo. If the words cannot be read it CANNOT be accepted.....

I will try to persuade him to allow your secondary security level photo to be in the same area, so that you don't have to go anywhere else, sound good?

Don't forget what time your flight is!!!! I'd hate to have to figure out a later flight over all this, dudes.

More to come! Watch this space. Wink

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 6:45 pm

Excellent, Peanut! That pic is a great trophy! The lads did it again!
Wonderful! LMAO! Laughing

Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 7:14 pm

They just keep coming back for more. Congratulations again Peanut.

Churchill wrote:

dude,
I complained to the printer

Hehe!

Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 7:18 pm

It's already 9:17 there....no way they're making their 10PM flight....

Trophy Videos · Posted: Thu Mar 20, 2008 7:27 pm

Well, at least they are wearing long sleeved shirts this time, instead of garbage bags. They should be a bit warmer sleeping under the tree tonight. Smile

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