Safari time! - Well, it was fun while it lasted

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Trophy Videos · Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:36 pm

More nice digs, Juan! he must feel this big (-) right now, small boi! Very Happy

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 7:09 pm

Juan Freizwidatt to bohigal wrote:

Sorry to blow the fantasy but I'm a guy in RL. Laughing

Don't I feel just as shell-shocked! After professing my love to you on this open forum?

I think you play this role just a bit too well.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 7:16 pm

And..... he's back!

K3lvin wrote:

Even if my friend Jim is so stupid to apologise, i will apologise on his behalf, please forgive him and reconcile with him. He might be childish, i am sure it must be due to heartache he has just encountered.
I have sponsored all the trip, even if we must come back, i dont think i can get any more money to do that. The loan applied for was not granted, the bank told me the collateral was enough to stand for the loan.
I am sure you would understand me, i am talking to you just the way my intelligence asked me to.
Can you just hear me out and dont be angry with Jim anymore.
He loves you and i believe he is the best for you.
Hugs and Kisses,
K3lvin.

K3lvin wrote:

I felt pity for Jim, he really tried to get to you, he could not make it wasnt his fault,

Please pardon him,

The only way Susan will pardon him is if he drags his lazy butt to Parakou again. Twisted Evil

AND -- as a special bonus, Jim just responded to Chin3du's taunt:

Quote:

HEY DUDE,

HURRY UP AND GET YOUR FUCKEN ASS HERE TO GET YOUR PUNISHMENT, I HAVE GONE LENGTHS TO MAKE SURE YOU PAY FOR ALL THESE.

YOUR FAMILY IS AT STAKE, I AM SURE YOU WOULD LIKE TO MEET THEM IN HELL. I GO SHOW YOU WETIN I TAKE PASS YOU

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 7:21 pm

STUPID LAD #2 wrote:

i am talking to you just the way my intelligence asked me to

Huh?

That's some funny stuff.

@Juan, I'm sure you already know this but if you are using a fake lad character in your bait, make sure you don't email the original lad as the victim and then as the other lad too closely together. Seems too conincidental that the victim and the other lad both always email the original lad minutes apart. Laughing

I almost lost a lad recently because I did that. I try to keep at least a 4 hour seperation.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:14 pm

@viereinsneun, no problem, I just figured you were gay. Laughing

(Not that there's anything wrong with that!)

@Mr. Otto -- I always put several hours between my character emails and my fake lad messages. This lad has bought my fake lad story hook, line and sinker.

I just replied to Jim's half-assed apology:

my character wrote:

I just finished writing to Kelvin. I told him you need to apologize for yourself. Having Kelvin do it for you isn't good enough. Then I found your email in the queue and for a second I thought maybe you really did want to reconcile. But apparently not, your "apology" is pretty cold, heartless and defensive.

I want to reconcile with you. Truly, honestly, really I do. I don't want things to end this way. But I need to have a sincere apology from you. And I need to see you. I don't care how you do it. If you are resourceful enough to start a new life in a foreign country, you are certainly capable of getting your cute little ass on a bus to Parakou. Mr. Rhodes tells me there's a bus that goes direct from Lagos to Parakou. I'm here until Sunday. If you really, truly love me and want to keep our magical relationship from souring, you need to do whatever it takes to go to Parakou. You can forget Cotonou, I'm not doing that ride again. Besides, according to Mr. Rhodes it's easier to get here from Lagos by way of Parakou anyway. If you do show up, even as late as Saturday, I'll gladly reschedule my return flight and stay another week or two. I love it here, I wouldn't mind staying -- especially if I could be with you. But if you aren't here by then, I'll know you were lying all along and that you don't really care at all. Then I'll give away the last of the presents and take the money I planned to use for us to have the time of our lives and just go home.

That's all there is to it.

I hope the reference to the gifts and cash keeps him focused. I want this bastard on the road again! Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 9:24 pm

Quote:

i just want to fuck you to fufil my promise.

abit dyslexic but he IS getting that fuck Laughing

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 593

Ha, this is great Juan, love your style, especially that slap you gave him Smile

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 6:36 am

Never give up. I just sent a 'good morning' email to Jim, just as I'm going to bed in California.... I hope to get a positive response when I wake up. I really want this bastard to travel again!

Quote:

I woke up early. I'm trying to type quietly because Reginald is still asleep. It's now Wednesday. You have today, tomorrow, Friday or Saturday to get here. If you do, I'll stay another week, or two, or as long as you want. I'll go anywhere you want and do anything you want. But if you don't come by then I'll know you were lying all along and I'll go home on Sunday as planned, and I'll never speak to you again as long as I live. So it's your choice. We can have fantastic sex and I'll treat you to anything in the entire world that you want, or you can stay there and whine about how cruel life is and how you can't afford to do anything. You can have paradise or you can live in hell. You decide. As for me, whatever you choose I will live my life happily.

I'm here. Come and be with me and I'll make you my king. Otherwise I'll be in Seattle but my door will be locked.

I love you. Come be with me.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 6:39 am

You such a sneaky ....!
I love the way your twisting that lads mind and lure him with the prospect of sex and money.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 6:50 am

Juan, my friend, this has really made my night. Your talent for finding the dumbest lads never ceases to amaze me. As a betting man, my money is on these knuckleheads hitting the road again.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 9:26 am

Strangely Jimbo has now gone all polite when dealing with the 5imba Camp. Does he think that being smarmy will get a full refund for him?

Quote:

Dear Mr and Mrs Rhodxx,
I got your mail, and i will scan all the receipts to you as soon as possible. I dont have a bank account here in Nigeria, so i prefer the money sent to my e-gold account.

Get in touch let me know how possible that is.
Jim.

@Juan - I wonder if there is a possibility that we can combine our stories here and lure Jimbo onto somewhere in Nigeria. Maybe Abuja?

We will only make a refund to a bank account or WU secure transfer to a designated bank in Abuja.
Maybe your lady could also hitch a ride off a driver on leave, who is heading home to Abuja?

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 1:44 pm

Hahahahaha! Well, I really think he should go travel to sign the documents. Is he in Lagos? I think the documents got sent to Abuja....[/i]

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:20 pm

Okay, race fans: there may be some life in this old horse after all. Very Happy

First, an email from Kelvin, taking responsibility for everything:

Quote:

Lovely Susan,

I have just finish haveing a long chat with Jim, telling him to apologise in a very big and surprising way, he told me the only way you have agreed to reconcile with him is for him to come down to Parakou, yes i think thats the best way to do it.

Come to think of it, Jim is a foreigner in Africa, he knows nowhere, i am the one who has been helping him move around, now i dont have anymore money to do that.

I have to resume work on Monday morning so i will be able to pay up all the debt i have incured on the trip to Benin Republic so far.

Susan i am sure you are a soft hearted woman and you will understand how it feels for me to have spent all i have earned on coming to Parakou the last time, but it was so unfortunate we did not make it.

I was also happy when i learnt we were going to have a wonderful time with you, i am also upset missing the same opportunity of having fun with a lovely and caring woman like you.

Please promise me you will forgive Jim even if he does not come to the camp, like i have told you, he cant make it without me. I have to work to pay up all the borrowed money. Susan i plead on behalf of Jim and myself. I also love love you just like Jim.

I will be so happy to hear that he has been forgiven so that the three of us can start another life outside the camp.

I love you Susan

Hugs and Kisses,
Kelvin

Then, an hour later, an email from Jim, begging for money:

Quote:

My love,

I woke up this morning to find your mail, saying i have not aplolgised in a very unique way. Please you just have to accept my heartiest apology and let old times pass away.

I believe the only way i can make it up to you is to come down to Parakou, i dont think that will work out, but i have another suggestion for you to send me the money so i can come down to Parakou.
I want to know if you can send the $3,500 to Kelvins e-gold account?
Get back so i can send you Kelvins e-gold account number.
Your love,
Jim.

Well, those are pretty unencouraging. But WAIT! WTF? A new character suddenly raises his head! Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to introduce Kelvin's brother, J3rry W1ll:

Quote:

Hello Susan,
How are you today hope all is well.....Well am jerry the elder brother to kelvin so i heard all that happened see Susan i will like you to know that is it kelvin selfishness that made jim not to come with him over there with him all the want is the little money you send him that all he never wanted you to do anything with jim all he want is all by him self...I saw the mail you send to him telling him that you drove to cotonue on Monday and you did not find them there i want to tell you now that its the plan work of kelvin and he told you that he had a loan and other things i heard all this i could not bear it so i decided to mail you and let you know that i will bring jim to you and i also heard you will be leaving by Sunday so that why i wanted you to know that am feeling what you are feeling...for you coming all the from the states to Africa to look for jim and you could not see him Baby i know its very painful so i want you to know that i will make it up to you by bringing jim to were you are now and please i want this transaction to be confidential and secret between you and i and jim and do not let kelvin know anything about this traveling of i and jim to come were you are now....

All i want you to do is to Send me Every details where you are and we will be coming through plane to where you are in two days time before you leave to the state.....

We are await your reply immediately so we can arrange on how i will bring jim along with me..Here is my private Phone number i will like if you call me immediately you receive this mail 234-xxxxxxx01 Hope to read from you soon....

Okay, time for me to put on my Sherlock hat and grab my pipe. Jerry used gmail, just like Jim, so I can't trace the IP (dammit). But Jerry's email is timestamped 11 minutes after Jim's. If this is Jim simply pulling a new angle, that's some fast typing. But if Jim wanted to pull a new angle, he doesn't need a new character -- especially if it contradicts the begging email he just sent. And Jerry has no money problems. He's ready to hop on a plane, to hell with all that bus and taxi nonsense....

My conclusion, Doctor Watson, is that the job has been chopped by a REAL rival lad. Very Happy

He says he saw my mail, and heard about my story. I think that part is probably true.

My usual knee-jerk reaction when a lad says not to tell someone about something is to immediately let the cat out of the bag. But this time I think I'll sit back and play along, keeping it secret. At least until the lad is on safari. It can't hurt for Kelvin to hear all about it then, and be ready for his buddy's return to the cafe. Twisted Evil

So it would appear this safari is back on, with a new lad ready to enjoy the luxurious amenities of 5imba 5afari Camp!

@Simba: I am planning to tell him to fly to Niamey, unless you have a better idea.

Stay tuned, this looks like a fun ride!

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:21 pm

And it still gors on. i think in going to have to make some more popcorn

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:50 pm

Maybe, just maybe this Jerry is actually Jim/Kelvin's OGA.

Maybe he decided that the 2 clowns were incapable of pulling this big a job off.

Maybe he has decided that Kelvin didn't pull his weight so he's going to do it properly.

Maybe if he spends some of his cash and brings Jim along he can dispose of the remains if anything goes wrong.

Or maybe this is a proper chop job. Unlikely though otherwise he wouldn't be suggesting he will be coming with Jim. UNLESS Jim, seeing that his OGA (Kelvin) was unwilling to risk any more for the big payoff, decided to try a little higher up the food chain.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:50 pm

Juan Freizwidatt wrote:

@Simba: I am planning to tell him to fly to Niamey, unless you have a better idea..!

@Juan - Great minds think alike.... Laughing

Reading my way through the latest Emails I was going to suggest that 5imba send a secure transfer of Jimbo's refund to Parakou as extra incentive to get him back there.

But with the mention of a plane, that shuffles all the pieces again, and I am definately in agreement for Niamey.
What do you think to sending a secure transfer to Sonibank Niamey?

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:00 pm

@TurkeyTrotter: you could well be right. Obviously someone doesn't want to see this ripe, rich maga walk away. Could be an oga or could be a chopper, either way I like it!

@Simba: Excellent suggestion, yet another bit of motivation. I'm going to ignore his begging. In fact I think I'm going to ignore both Kelvin and Jim altogether for a while, just to see what kind of reaction they have to being snubbed. But Jerry will definitely be hearing from me. Very Happy

Niamey here we come!

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:09 pm

Pardon my ignorance - what's the advantage of the Niamey in this case? I do not see Niger on the Simba website.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:14 pm

@Juan - The only hitch, is how do I know about Jerry and Email him details of the refund that is intended for Jimbo?

I will have to advise Jimbo of the transfer, and you will have to mistakenly let Jerry know about the refund too... Wink

Trophy Videos · Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:14 pm

Wow! I'm surprised, again, by this safari! I thought I was out, but they pulled me back in. Good luck this time, maybe getting them lost in the National Park and never heard from again would be nice. Cool

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:14 pm

@bohigal: it's a nice long trip, further west than the other options. It's also logical as being close to the camp.

I forgot to check my fake lad account this morning. Yesterday I taunted Jim some more:

my fake lad wrote:

OH, I DEY SO AFRAID OOOO!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHA UNA STUPID LITTLE BOI U FOUGHT WIT DI BABY UNA WOULD LOSE .U OPEN MOUTH BIG BUT U DEY JUSS DI SMALLBOI MUGUN OK .U C HAU STUPID U BI .UNA CANT EVEN TEK MONI FROM DI MAGA WEN SHE BEGS U FO TEK IT .IDIOT .I DEY GOIN FO FORK AM AGAIN 2MORROW NA DEN I DEY GOIN FO GET ALL AM CASH. UNA GET NOTHING, GOAT FORKER . I TEK IT ALL .

I DEY HAPPY I COME HIERE, I LIVE LAIK DI KING NA FORK UR MAGA NA GET PRESENTS TOO. AN U STAY IN 9JA AN FORK GOATS AN CHOP RATS 4 DINNER COS U R SUCH A FOOOOLLLLL. HAHAHAHA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUSAN A FAIN WOMAN WIT BIG TITS NA SHE REALLY SABI HAU 2 SUCK MAI COCK GUUUUUUDDDD !!

Jim's response isn't exactly signature material but the important thing is that he still believes in Chin3du:

Jim wrote:

WHEN YOU FINISH, JUST STAY THERE NO COME BACK, COS YOUR PAPA DON ALREADY DIE, I DEY WAIT FOR YOU.

Chinedu isn't finished with Jim, not by a long shot. There's still $40K to take from Susan.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:16 pm

@Simba: oh yeah, that doesn't quite work.... Maybe you should go with WU Secure for the time being.

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 4:50 pm

Susan just wrote to Jerry:

Quote:

Dear Jerry,

I'm so delighted to get your email!! How nice to meet you, so to speak!! And I'm thrilled to hear that you will bring Jim to see me at long last!!!!!!!! If that is a promise, I'll extend my stay for at least a week. I don't want to run off the day after you get here! This is wonderful news!!

I'm staying at the 5imba 5afari Camp in northern Benin. It's truly a wonderful resort. I don't know the exact location, but we're close to Pendajari park. In any event I just talked to the director here, Mr. Rhodes, and he said the best way to get here by plane is to fly into Niamey, Niger. That's what I did and it's really a pleasant and fairly quick trip from the airport. The camp runs a shuttle to Niamey once a day. All you need to do is let Mr. Rhodes know when your plane is coming in and they'll make all the necessary arrangements. This is a very luxurious place and the staff is incredibly accomodating!

Please let me know the details of your trip just as soon as possible! I can't wait! This is the best news I've had all week!!!!

And don't worry, I won't say a word about this to Kelvin or Jim. I'm sure it will be a fantastic surprise for Jim, I suggest you wait until the last minute to tell him so he'll be all the more excited!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!! Smile

Fondly,
Susan

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:24 pm

Juan, GREAT! Hahahahahaha! Awesome work! Send him to Niamey! HAhahahahaha!

(sdorry, have to run but wanted to share my enthusiasm for this bait! Great work!)

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:38 pm

When you're done with this bait, please post it in the Letters Archive.

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