Safari time! - Well, it was fun while it lasted

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Not quite a Newb Joined: 08 Jan 2008 Posts: 29

I hope this can stay on track for a couple more days. I'm loving it.

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 9:22 pm

Well, it looks like it's over. Sad

The bastard didn't bother going after all.

Jim wrote:

Despite the fact that i love you so much, i dont think i can make it up to you anymore. Our initial agreement was for you to come done to Nigeria, i dont know why in Gods name you went to Simba Safari Camp. I dont think such exist.

I have wasted my precious and little money looking for the Camp all around Benin Repbulic, I am so sorry to say i cant make it there, i am sick and tired of all these.
If you cant come down to Nigeria, then forget about me and everything that concerns me. I am tired of being a love slave. Laughing

If you really want me, you have to send the presents to Nigeria via FEDEX so i can be sure of how much you want me.
Let me hear from you now or never,
Your Love,

Jim wrote:

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH SUE, BUT YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND MY FEELINGS, I DONT WANT TO COME TO COTONOU ANYMORE, THIS IS CAUSING ME A LOT OF PAIN AND NO GAIN.
I ADVISE YOU COME DOWN IF YOU LOVE ME OR YOU GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE WITH REGINALD AND PETER THERE IN TH CAMP.

LET ME KNOW IF YOU ARE COMING OR NOT.
ALL MY LIFE,
JIM.

Well, at least I have a chance to vent some frustrations on him:

my character wrote:

YOU BASTARD!!!!!! You selfish, rotten son of a bitch!!!! I rode all the fucking way down to Cotonou TWO DAYS IN A ROW to pick you up and despite your promises you didn't show. You wasted one hell of a lot of my time!!! Why didn't you tell me before I left this morning??? Yout shithead bastard!!!! That's two 13 hour trips you put me through!!! You arrogant prick! You scum-sucking pile of dogshit!! You disease-ridden dickwad! You crap-eating bowl of piss!!

"CAUSING ME NO GAIN"???? What the hell is that supposed to mean?? Are you only after me for my money??? I thought you loved me! Evidently not, all you want is to GAIN! You want me to fucking Fedex presents to you because you're too fucking lazy to come get them. Well FUCK THAT!!!! I'll burn them before I'll ship them to you!!! They're PRESENTS, dammit, not PAYMENT. If I give them to you it's because I want to, not because I owe you. I don't owe you jack shit you bastard! You fucking owe me a LOT. I spent at least $20,000 just on airfare alone to get here, not counting the cost of the camp, or the hotels in Paris, or all the presents you seem to believe are your GAIN. You masturbating genital wart!

Well forget that, you selfish pile of pond scum! You have pushed me too far now! I'm going to bed now, in the morning I'll make plans for my return home. The presents you seem to feel belong to you are going to people who deserve them. Fuck you. I don't know what I ever saw in you. You seemed like a nice, caring, honest guy but you turned out to be just another grasping little boy.

Bye, Jim. Go stick your head in a tub of bleach.

Chin3du the dolla chopper will get back to him later. He's going to find out just how much he lost by being lazy....

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 10:13 pm

@ Juan - I take my hat off to you for inflicting a whole heap of misery on this mugu.... Twisted Evil

I still see two options here though for prolonging things...

Firstly, he wants his new toys sent by Fedex. Well I am sure that we know of a very good and reliable shipping co. with offices in Abuja.

Secondly he wants you to visit Nigeria. Thats ok, you could do that, anywhere north of that dangerous place called, errrrm Lagos.. Rolling Eyes

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 10:24 pm

Hahahahahahah! Juan! Good one! I love your rant!

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 10:29 pm

Quote:

You scum-sucking pile of dogshit!! You disease-ridden dickwad! You crap-eating bowl of piss!!

Gee Sue, tell us how you really feel about him!

I grovel before your greatness. Remain blessed.

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 11:25 pm

Oh poor frustrated 5ue, lazy wanker J0e.

After a night of rest, maybe those Rolexes Sue had engraved with Joe's name could be sent by courrier as the Rolex shop won't take them back now anyway...

I really feel for 5ue - Juan, you write well!

Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 11:48 pm

Regarding that slap of epic quality:

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:37 am

Awesome

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:47 am

That is some seriously masterful insulting. I bow humbly at your greatness.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:53 am

I think I'm in love...

Great going. I can only aspire to your awesome level of amazingness.

Trophy Videos · Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 12:54 am

Nice ending! But I'm sure a few more digs couldn't hurt! It was really fun reading this one everyday, Juan. Tip of the hat to you! Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 1:08 am

I'm humbed by all the compliments... Embarassed

I don't really think this is completely done, or at least I hope not. I don't believe there's another safari in the works but I do expect some kind of groveling reply a bit later, once he realizes how much he's missing out on.

But even if not, I'm glad to have shown this guy up as the smallboi he is. He cried (literally, I'm sure) over his chopped dollar on Christmas eve, cried again over the second chop a few days later, and suffered five days of traveling and waiting for Simba's luxurious but non-existent shuttle van. And now he's losing $40K and a load of gifts. I don't think he's very happy. And with a format like his, I don't think he's very successful either!

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 1:36 am

Absolutely amazing. Beautiful baiting and a lesson to all. Your humongous slap heard round the world is like a good song in a musical. It progresses the story line and in this case the trauma.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:32 am

I'm about to go to sleep, but Susan is just getting up in Benin, and just emailed the lad:

Quote:

In the clear, bright, warm light of morning I'm more relaxed than last night, but I'm still pissed off. You really treated me like dog shit.

After writing to you I took a shower to wash off the filth of the day and most importantly the thought of you. Then I went to the bar. Reginald was there. We had a lot of time to talk during the drive yesterday, and he knew just how pissed I was. When I saw him I told him to get a bottle of cognac and follow me. I took him back to my room and fucked his brains out. The poor guy wanted it so badly he was in pain. It's been obvious for days, but I was holding out because of you,. Duh! How stupid was that??? He was in heaven, and so was I. It was fantastic. When we woke up a little while ago I gave him your Rolex. He was thrilled beyond words.

I've decided that I'm going to stay here a few more days. I'm going to fuck Reginald and Peter (maybe both at the same time, if they're up to it) until I'm so wiped out from orgasm after orgasm that I can't even function. I'm going to drink cognac until they run out in the bar. I'm going to give the other Rolex to Peter, and all the other stuff to them as well. But I'll give the laptop to Mr. Rhodes, he has been so incredibly good to me.

I'm glad I ran into Reginald last night. I remembered that there's more to life than a greedy fuckface like you. His absolute joy at being with me was so exciting I turned to jelly. How nice to be appreciated! Instead of being insulted and abused by you. I don't know what I saw in you, but in the end it worked out because I'm being fucked silly by Reginald, and he's a major stud! God what a gorgeous cock he has!!

And he loves the Rolex. I'm glad. It would have been such a shame if it had ended up on your pestilential wrist.

I hope he responds. This is just stage one... Twisted Evil

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 6:52 am

Juan Freizwidatt wrote:

I hope he responds. This is just stage one... Twisted Evil

You are so evil! I just love it Very Happy

Master Baiter Joined: 23 Dec 2007 Posts: 128

@Juan

Superb piece of baiting.

My deepest respect to you.

Also, when I thought that no more pain could be inflicted on the lad you've come with a new noose to hook him even further in agony.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:41 am

@ Juan - I've had a great time following this one. It really is one for the books and the best part is that in the end, after he gets clean and has some rice or something, he will feel like he made a big mistake by not returning to meet you and collect the goods. The whole thing was a work of art, and everyone involved deserves a thumbs up. Now:

Quote:

You masturbating genital wart!

Heavens.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 9:02 am

@Juan - I think I'm in love with you. Can't you keep 1 of those Rolex' for me?

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 11:26 am

I got an unexpected Email from Jimbo this morning..

Quote:

I SUSPECT YOU ALL TO BE CHEATS, NO REFUNDS WAS MADE TO THE LOST I INCURED. ANYWAY I WILL LEAVE ALL THAT, AND I WILL FILE UP A NEGATIVE COMPLAIN AGAINST YOUR CAMP

To which the 5imba Safari guest relations manager replied:

Quote:

Dear Mister Caxxns,

I have to admit that I was very disappointed with your recent
tomfoolery, asking us to collect you from your hotel at La Canaris and
then not being there when our driver called for you.

You not only inconvenienced our driver but also another guest who was
patiently waiting to be collected from Parakou.

The 5imba Safari Group Ltd, had previously made you a guarantee that we
would reimburse all unexpected expenses for travel and accommodation
incurred on your recent Benin safari.

Please would you scan all of the receipts that you collected, together
with your bank account details so that this wire transfer may be
arranged.

In the circumstance that you are unable to produce receipts for all
expenses being claimed, the 5imba Safari Group Ltd will instead offer
you the equivalent value in travel vouchers to be used on your next
5imba Safari.

Best regards,

Gloria Rhodxx.
Guest Relations Manager - 5imba Safari Group Ltd

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 3:29 pm

I think maybe I touched a nerve! Very Happy

I got up this morning to find five emails from our hapless lad:

K3lvin wrote:

I and my friend Jim trusted and believed in you, but you turned out to be very harsh and wicked on us.

Anyway, you have broken the heart of a nice and loving man.

I hope you realise what you have done and get back to your senses.

Jim loves you..

Jim wrote:

I have wept enough, i believe i lost you, and i will never fall in love with any white woman again, never in my life will i do that. I have felt disappointe ment and hatred from you, anyway i will go on with a new life here in Africa, i will send for my documents in states to be sent down here through the US embassy, i am sure they will do it for me.

I will get a job here and earn my own money. I never knew you are a very big flirt, you lied to me that you loved me, meanwhile you loved Peter and Reginald the moment you set your eyes on them.

Thats just too unfair.

Is it that you love to have sex with every man you meet for the first time? Anyway, if you still care, you can come to Nigeria so we can fuck, i dont need the presents anymore, i just want to fuck you to fufil my promise.

With love,

Jim wrote:

Look Dear Sue,

I am not being selfish, i have wanted the best for the both of us, dont you think you were just being STUPID travelling down to Benin Rep. instead of Nigeria. I told you i was in Nigeria when i met you, but you went to Cotonou.

I think all the fault is from you, if you dont love me anymore, let me know and i will go on with my life. I have got many black girls here who want to fuck my gorgeous cock.

You will really miss my cock if you ever leave me.

I wont say more than this, if you love me, you will come to Nigeria, i hope you get back to your senses and realise what you have done to me. You have really hurt me, and you alne can put my heart together again.

Jim wrote:

If you think and you have got conscience, you will remember that i travelled done to Cotonou three times to look for you, you might not believe me,

If you want me fine, if you dont want me, i will go. but one thing i want you to understand is that Peter and Reginald cannot satisfy you the way i planned to.

I am going to find a better life if you dont come back

K3lvin wrote:

If you listen to Jim, it will be well for you.

So a change of plans for me, I don't think Sue will be heading back to the US just yet...

Master Baiter Joined: 30 May 2007 Posts: 101

Jim wrote:

Anyway, if you still care, you can come to Nigeria so we can fuck, i dont need the presents anymore, i just want to fuck you to fufil my promise.

Who said romance was dead ? Laughing

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 4:09 pm

I just replied to him.

writing to Jim, my character wrote:

Listen, you're the one who blew it. You knew I rode all the way to Cotonou Sunday because you said on Saturday that you would be there "tomorrow." Okay, so that was a huge fuck-up, I still blame you. But be that as it may, then you promised me you'd be there on Monday. I drove all the way down there AGAIN. You knew I was going, you could have told me you changed your mind, but no -- you just let me waste another day. That was just plain mean. There's no excuse for that whatsoever. If you really loved me you would never have made me waste my time, and destroy my hopes. You deliberately waited until I'd already gone before telling me you changed your mind. And you expect me to forget about that and forgive you? When you haven't even apologized????? All you've done is make demands, and whine like a little boy whose toy was stolen.

If you truly loved me you wouldn't be making demands on me, you would be racing here to be in my arms. You'd be begging for forgiveness and making amends, not ordering me around. You're the one who turned tail and gave up because you couldn't wait one lousy hour for the shuttle to get to Parakou. Then you act like it's MY fault.

If you get your little ass here quickly, I might forgive you. Maybe, depending upon how well you fuck. But I'm not leaving this paradise to go anywhere other than home. For now, I'm not in such a hurry to go home, I'm finally having some fun. I spent the day with Pete today. He's fantastic!!!! I'm trying to talk him out of going back to Nigeria so soon, he's supposed to go back on Thursday. I need more time with that glorious cock of his.

If you and K3lvin want some of the same fun with me, you can come here. You have one last and final chance, otherwise I'll be heading home on Sunday as originally scheduled. And maybe taking Reginald with me, since he's eager to see Seattle.

It's up to you.

writing to K3lvin, my character wrote:

If Jim loves me, he sure has a funny way of showing it. He deliberately made me drive to Cotonou two days in a row, knowing full well he wouldn't be there! That's a "nice and loving man"?? I don't think so. That's more like a mean and vicious man.

I just told Jim that if he wants me he'd better learn how to apologize and make it up to me. Ordering me around is NOT the way. He sure doesn't know much about women, does he??!!! If he truly loves me he would move heaven and earth to be with me. He wouldn't be crying like some small boy, he would be doing ANYTHING to be here with me. Instead he has shown himself to be a bitter, vindictive, jealous little boy.

I'm leaving for home on Sunday. In the meantime I'm going to have as much fun as I possibly can. That COULD still include you and Jim, but that's entirely up to you two.

Maybe, just maybe, I can get him off his ass. My fingers are crossed.

EDIT: Now it's time for his rival Chin3du to rub yet more salt in the wound:

my fake lad wrote:

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!! DI MAGA NA VERY VEX WIT U BASTERD FOOOOLLLL !!!!!

BOI I AM HAPPY, SHE DI VERY SEXY WOMAN !!!!!. I FORK AM HARD NA SHE LOVES IT ,OK. SHE GIV DI ROLEX E SAY BI FO U BUT U WERE TOO STUPID 2 COME TAIK IT SO U LOSE . WETIN DI MUGUN OOOO!!!! THANKS ASSHOLE !

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:32 pm

Hahahahaha! Juan! I LOVE it! It's all his fault! hahahahahah!

He has to be wondering if a trip back is worth it.... you might get some more miles from him!

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:49 pm

Dude, you've got me feeling guilty about not flying right down to Benin. You're going to get him so depressed he'll be paralysed. I feel sorry for your RL boyfriends.

What does this mean?

Quote:

WETIN DI MUGUN

I've seen similar before, like "na wetin sef."

edit: If they don't get off dey ass, I wonder if at some point the choppa should hurt or disappoint Sue in some way so Jim/Kevin can have a chance to play hero.

Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 5:58 pm

bohigal wrote:

I feel sorry for your RL boyfriends.

Yo, dude! Sorry to blow the fantasy but I'm a guy in RL. Laughing

An old married guy at that... I'm just using my experience from being on the receiving end of feminine wiles. Wink

Quote:

WETIN DI MUGUN. "

Basically, "so you're a fool." And "OOOOOOO" is like a verbal exclamation point to hammer it harder.

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