She's got unicorns!

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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 7:47 pm

My pet-scammer is an amazing woman.

She was selling dogs, the usual set up. I told her I was into exotic pets, and asked her if perhaps she had any unicorns.

And you know what? She did! What an amazing coincidence!

Quote:

yes i have the unicorn,so What type of unicorn, will you like to adopt just let me know?

I couldn't decide between my three favorite breeds, so I asked her for advice. (I was hoping she'd choose the Invisible Pink type, but that will have to be for another bait).

Quote:

how are you doing today? hope you are Great. Yes i will like you to go for the right breed which is Siameses ok because Siameses will be so much easy for you and gentle for you to ride Like this one i want to Sell for you.
She has no name yet and she is fully breed. She still is still very much available for new home.She is 8 weeks old . She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered and her shots are given up to date,she is excellent in potty trianed and good in temparement .
All her papers will accompany her , I am in West Africa, Nigeria due to my new marriage with my husband and we are meant to be living with each other henceforth. we have her right here with us,And I hope you are also a good Unicorn lover that will take very good care of our unicorn.we are going to ship her to you via American Airline or Delta Airline on sameday or next day delivery after shipment through a shipping agent,I am giving her out for $300 together with shipping and handling.
The lovely Unicorn will come along with all her necessary health paper work like; Akc/Nkc/Fci Registered Paper.
Two Years Health Guarantee,
Health Insurance Paper,
Vet Record,Birth Certicate,
Shot Book,
Tavel Crate,
Toys And Foods.
I will accept payment via Credit card, Western union or Money gram. If you are really interested in having my Unicorn as part of your family. I want you to get back to me with the full name, address phone number including the nearest airport to you where you will want the baby to be deliver to.
Thanks.

So now I'm waiting for my certificate from the Unicorn Fancier's Association. I wonder what she'll do when I ask her for a picture...

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 7:57 pm

Quote:

you will want the baby to be deliver to

a baby unicorn no less.
Would that make it a unicornette?

hmm, do you get a wafer with it?
(English joke)

A piccy is a must, you need to check that it's colour doesn't clash with your curtains

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:16 pm

It sounds like our old friend "Goat" is back in action:

Can you post his addy and let the forum have some fun. Laughing

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:24 pm

Quote:

she is excellent in potty trianed

I'd like to see that - or maybe not, but isn't it time it used a proper loo ? Very Happy

I think you should go for the rarer two horned unicorn - but then you'd just end up with a standard Lad goat I guess. Make sure you get a certificate of virginity. You know what Lads are like. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm

Dumbass scammer wrote:

She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered

Unicorns are dogs?? I didn't know this. I always assumed they were equine.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm

^^^Rumbero- No idea who Goat is. The Ladette is calling herself "Vict0ria Sm1th".

I wonder if she's related to Atuku Alli Laughing

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:50 pm

Ask her if she has any flying rendieer like Rudolph, or any highly intelligent bears like Yogi Bear. Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:56 pm

I do hope that she can guarantee that it will be a tri-horned one in it's old age.

And you may want to find out if its wings have been clipped and if it's nails have been clipped, too. Can't have a unicorn that scratches.

Maybe find out if its dew claws were removed and if you are going to have breeding rights or if you have to ensure that the unicorn is spayed/neutered.

And you need to find out what those registration fees are since it has 3 registrations. My parents just got a dog that is registered 3 ways, and the dog's real registration cost about $100. So I'm sure you will need to know those fees. I'd also ask for the email addy of the person in charge of each of those registration clubs - so you can make sure you can find out all about the steps you are going to need to get it properly registered.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:02 pm

Does she have any pretty pink prancing ponies?

Bruin

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

ChainYanker, GOAT is a lad that showed up awhile back selling exotic animals, and like your lad he had EVERYTHING! I bought me a shark for $600. When I asked how it was going to be delivered he told me it would be sent in a special UPS sharkproof box.

It sounds like your lad is son-of-goat.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:06 pm

yeah - goat was so funny. I had posted the post that ended up going for many pages with what people ordered from goat. I forgot all about him - - so if you search my username and the keyword goat - you can find that post.

Master of Master Baiters Joined: 09 Aug 2007 Posts: 593

I would ask him what the going price is for an apocalypse pony - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGGLENEEVYc

Trophy Videos · Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:10 pm

Post his email! Post his email! hehehe Very Happy

I want another pick pony!

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:18 pm

Dumbass scammer wrote:

She is AKC/NKC/FCI registered

F�d�ration Cynologique Internationale registration? Well maybe, if it was adopted by dogs and raised in a Kennel.

Nice to see that the American Kennel Club and National Kennel Club are now also running franchises in Western Africa.

You have to get those pictures, ChainYanker.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:52 pm

SlapHappy wrote:

I want another pick pony!

Is a pick pony like a pick nose? Or a stuffed up nose... Laughing

Sorry mate, not that I never make typos... Cool

EDIT for my own typo... Very Happy

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 11:07 pm

Ooohhh what colour to go for? Spectrum Unicorns usually attract a premium as you have to get a CITES accredited vet to certify them, doncha know.
Failing that, you may be able to get one in infra-red, but they're a bit more aetheric and prone to respiratory diseases so get it checked out before parting with your cash!

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:01 am

^^ I knew that my typo would bring you into the light, Paranoid. It was a supersecret hypnotic suggestion, that only your brain was programmed to respond to. Now on to the remaining part of my devilish plan.... Smile

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 2:58 am

I am at your command...

I am listening...

I will request a PPPP for you from the appropriate authorities... Shocked

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:35 am

Gomer wrote:

Make sure you get a certificate of virginity. You know what Lads are like.

That's just redundant now isn't it? Of COURSE the unicorn will be a vargin. Unicorns and vargins are the exact same thing: Just fragments of someone's imagination!

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:38 am

She can get a lot of things, including Critters, Manbearpigs and Polar bears...

419Eater is my life Joined: 21 Nov 2005 Posts: 264

Was "Goat" the lad that was selling one eyed trouser snakes? I laughed myself silly over that.

@Chain Yanker

Ask if they have any unicorns that are tame and trained to lay their head in your lap. If you want to know why see this:

http://www.whiterosesgarden.com/Unicorns/UNI_other_myths/UNI_virgin_unicorn.htm

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 12:44 pm

Come on post his e-mail.... I want to buy a spider pig!

Unicorns are great though. A picture would be a good idea though so you can make sure you know what you are getting.

Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:14 pm

Next time you email them see if they have any burmes laughing wallaby's

Trophy Videos · Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 2:44 pm

@ChainYanker - The Man and I have requested the fool's email address.
Are you ignoring us? Do our requests fall on deaf ears? Do we have to have the Mods release the devil hounds? hehehe Laughing

Baiting Guru Joined: 07 Jul 2006 Posts: 5727

^^^ Don't do it Chainyanker! They just want to buy your unicorns out from underneath you! I think that's how I lost my great white shark. And I had salt added to my swimming pool and everything.