I Want my Monkey (ongoing pet scam)

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Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 12:38 am

I WANT MY MONKEY

I found the posting of a new eater member who almost fell victim to a pet scam but wised up just before wiring the money Western Union (for real!)....Praise be to God! They want the old Charles Bronson revenge feeling but have already provided way to much personal information, excluding shoe size.
Being the nice brother-in-law that I am, I had to intervene
and help my little sister buy this monkey so they could make things right for the family.
Potato Head (this is what I will call the new member for now-- no offense intended!) has provided me with all of the necessary info to sharpen my sword with. Four lads are in the mix and are frothing at the mouth to take Mr. Potato Head's money. For simplification, I will call them lads A,B,C and D
I have never baited a pet scamer before, so this will be a learning experience for me. Also will need to read up on the Western Union tricks to make sure they get lots of exercise if nothing else! Now this may all burn and crash but it's worth a try.

I will post the first e-mail contact after Mr. Potato Head suddenly fell ill. I had it's variations depending on the lad, but basically the same BS for all!

SUGGESTIONS WECOMED!!

Let the show begin.

Sir,

I am the brother-in-law of XXX and I am almost in tears writing this e-mail to you but it must be done. Recently, his little daughter has taken a turn for the worst. His wife and the children are the love of his life and this is destroying the family. I am a little choked up at the moment so please bear with me.
After taking their little one to the emergency room, XXX collapsed at her bedside. The doctor has informed us that he was just unable to handle the stress of it all and with his bad heart, has lapse into a semi-coma. The doctor says that this is not a good thing but sometimes pets bring coma patients around! At his bedside, he whispered something into his wifes ear like, �Lxxxy� the monkey, and that we must get it for his little angel, and then slipped into a deep sleep! You must excuse me, but I am having a very hard time writing this right now so PLEASE bear with me.
I knew that he was trying to buy a special Monkey for her , but he was trying to keep it a secret from all of us as a surprise. Because of this, I do not know how far along he is with this other than some notes that I found by his computer. The only thing that I was able to make out of it was your e-mail address, picture of a monkey and a telephone number of +237 XXXX but have desperately tried calling it several times without answerer! Is this number a United States number?
For Gods sakes, you must help me bring this family back together again and please let me know what it will take to get that Monkey that he wanted! I will do whatever it takes or pay anything to see them smile again, just one more time!
I must stop for now because I can't think very clearly, and need to go back to the hospital to see how I can help. Please respond to my e-mail address [email protected] because his account is password protected and I can't access it.
If you could, would you please call me on my personal cell phone: XXXXX. I will try to have it with me all of the time. Money is not a issue now, whatever it takes. I will pay you well!

God bless you,
XXX

{I know, I'm full of it!}

12-28-07
LAD A REPLIES
IP 77.220.2.54 Kenya

"Ok thanks for the mail and interest that you have for my baby Monkey. So i will just need you to send the money so that i prepare all her things and ship her. I am very ready to proceed with shipping.
You will send me $350 for me to get her over to you. I understand that you are ready to give her a good home. As soon as you send the money, i will take her to the airport to book her flight after booking the flight, i will get back to you with the full flight information so that you know the exact time that she will be coming over.
As for the payment, you will use Western Union Money Transfer to send the money to me at this address:
Full Names..........................NXXr XXXX
Country...............................Cameroon.
State...................................Littoral.
City......................................Douala.
Zip Code...............................00237.
Test Question........................xxx.
Test Answer..........................Soon.
As soon as you send the money, you will just have to get back to me with the confirmation reference number and the senders name of the transfer.
Also get back to me with your full delivery information which is your full names, contact address, phone number and the name of the nearest airport where you will want to get her.
Hope to hear from you soon."

12-28-07
REPLY to LAD A

Dear Mr. XXXX,

Thank you for your fast reply. After noticing that you are from Cameroon, my heart just skipped a beat. God may have answered xxx and families prayers and little Lxxy will have a new home in America!
My daughter is with the Peace Corps and stationed at Younde Bamenda, Cameroon! Is that near you because you said that you would be picking up the money in Douala, Cameroon? Her name is xxx and she would be able to come over and check the paper work and look the monkey over and all. She is a nurse. Maybe you may know her, she is a white woman.
We could save the $250.00 shipping fee. You have not talked about the price of the Monkey as of yet.
She will be coming back to the States for New Years party and xxx could ride on her back! Please let me know soon if she can come to visit, OK?
God does work in mysterious ways.
God be with you,
xxxx

12-29-07
LAD A REPLIES

But i don't know where i can meet your daughter, so what is her phone number so that i can call you. I wanted us to come up with something, maybe you pay half of the money so that i complete it with what i have here and ship her to you.
Is that ok with you? If so we can proceed.
I am very ready to give you the Monkey, she has all her papers.

12-29-07
REPLY TO LAD A
xxxx,
She is stationed in small village outside of Bamenda. She only has access to one pay phone in village square with long wait to use. White people have to wait last to use!
She said something about using motor-taxi to meet you and baby xxx half way. You must know country well, is this village far from you? She will have cash and pay you well, but fears robbers! Can you meet half way, and if so where?
No need for shipping money, she will take baby monkey. How much do you want for the monkey so I can tell her?
Please time is short and she wants to come back with baby monkey. Can you help us so we can make xxx and family happy?
Please reply soon,
xxxx

{if I get a safari out of this...I will need a paper bag to hyperventilate...never tried}

On to LAD B...............

12-28-07
LAD B REPLIES
IP address 83.229.48.141 Cameroon

Hello xxxx,
Thank for the mail.After xxx and xxx lastly wrote to me,i haven't heard from them and i was worried.I am very sorry to hear all the sad story and pray God intervene and help us out.I feel very sorry for all what you have said.
About the baby xxx, i still have her for sale and very happy you want to get her for your brother-in-law.My grand mom is still very sick and we are also praying hard this way for her quick recovery.I can get xxx shipped and delivered to you tomorrow Saturday if you are ok with that.Then i will need your full names,address and airport closed to your address to ship her.I have attached a few recent pics of the baby so that you can see if that's the picture you saw.
I can be reached at xxxxx.
Kind Regards,xxxx

12-28-07
REPLY TO LAD B
xxxx,

Thank you for your kind words. xxx has not opened his eyes as of yet and his wife, my sister, is having a very hard time!
If things go as planned, and decide to get xxx, I will be picking her up at the the San Diego International airport in California, USA. I tried calling you on xxxx, but it goes not go through. Do you live in the US? If not, where do you and xxx live?
I do not know anything about the details like cost, shipping, medical records, shots, and do not know if you have already discussed this with xxx, but as you already know, he is in no position to discuss this right now. Could you provide me with this?. Dolly looks very cute and I don't how you could let her go! Is that you in the picture, if so you are very attractive.
I can be reached on xxxx if you have any questions.
I hope your granny is doing well.

God Bless,
xxxx

12-29-07
LAD B REPLIES

Hello xxx,
Thanks for the mail and i pray xxxx gets out of comma soon okay.I understand how things can be hard for you and your sister and and know with God,everything will be ok soon.
I have no problem shipping her to San Diego Airport if you will be there on time to pick her up.I will provide detail flight information when i have shipped her so that you will be there to pick her up.It will be a 7 hours flight from here(Victoria Bay,Cameroon)
The price i gave to xxx on xxx was $600.00 with shipping fee included.She is already vaccinated and have all necessary papers and i can ship her before this coming new year.I will send all detail paper work through e-mail for you to see and she will be coming with originals of the papers.In the pictures i attached,there is one showing her in a cage and that is how she will be coming to you okay.The phone number i gave is my cell number and it is out of US coz i am in Cameroon and that is where i will be shipping xxxx from for you to pick her at the San Diego Airport.So you dial the number as given.
If there is any other information you need to know,please let me know.I am the one in the picture with xxx and my husband is here with me and will assist me in the shipping process.I will try to call you from this end since you have problems reaching me.
Hope xxx gets well soon and celebrate this New year with xxx.
Kind Regards,xxxx N W.

On to LAD C.............

12-28-07
LAD C REPLIES
All US IP's (?)

Hi

I do understand what it means to be trapped in such a situation,but then i don't know the said xxx you're talkin' bout.That notwithstanding,the monkey is $1000 including shipping charges from Morocco where am located.
So get back and let me know how soon you're able to get the monkey.

Thanks.
xxx.

{of course....he just has a monkey to sell!}

REPLY TO LAD C
12-28-07
Hello xxx,

Thank you for your fast reply. As I said before, xxx left some paper work on his computer desk and it had your name, e-mail address and the monkey's name of xxxx on it. Are you sure that you did not discuss this with xxx?
Anyway, your $1,000.00 fee sounds very reasonable. Has the monkey had all of his/her? shots and is the monkey in good health? Please tell me all about the monkey because if this is the monkey that xxx wanted for his daughter, then this is the monkey that he will get! The money is no problem. Please search your mind for his name and if I am mistaken, I will not waste any more of your time. If yes, could you send picture of xxxx so I can put it in front of xxx's face to maybe make him wake up?

With Kindness,
xxxx

LAD C REPLIES
12-29-07

Call me at : +21279988595
Thanks.
xxx.

{Note: googled Telephone number and looks like he also scams Hyacinth Macaws. His hunting grounds are xxxx.com and xxx (UK) all classified add postings. Under one add, he goes by XXX and uses e-mail address: [email protected]}

REPLY TO LAD C
12-29-07
xxx,
Thanks for your reply. I am a traveling salesmen in the States and I am on the road now. It is very hard for me to call you because of my bushiness at hand. I have OnGuard Satellite reception for my laptop which works very well, but unfortunate, I can't make out going voice calls, but my company is working on that. Please call me and leave msg or E-mail me with requested information. As in before e-mail, I need to know if you are the xxx that xxx was working with before he was stricken ill.
I also have offer from a Mrs. xxx from Cameroon, Africa and she wants $600.00 for her monkey, but if you are the xxx that xxx talked about, I want to give you first shot.
I am at a rest stop now so need to get back on the road. Again my number is xxxx.
Thanks for working with me and hope that you understand.
xxxx
PS: Is your name xxx or xxx. I do not want to offend you

Regards,
XXX

{Mr Potato Head found old e-mail from LAD C and forwarded to me}

12-29-07
TO LAD C
xxx,
I have some good news. My sister found some notes on a piece of paper that xxx wrote down. Says xxxx is 8 months old and lots of details her..... Thank you!
If things go right, I will be picking her up in San Diego Airport. Were do you and xxxx live? If Cameroon, then maybe you know Mrs. xxxx. If so, I have some good news.
Short on time and need to get back on the road.
Thanks for working with us on this for you are so helpful.
xxx
PS: Please send Pic of xxxx, we can't find.

LAD D has not replied yet. Good sources have it that She is busy doing the Lords work!

12-28-07
LAD D ever replied so I sent another one.
[email protected]

Dear Melissa
I have not heard from you. Did you receive my e-mail in regards to xx and his daughter's tragic circumstances? I am a little worried that you have not replied! Gods work can be overwhelming sometimes, but a family over in America is depending on you. Please write or call me on xxxxx.

May God protect you always,
xxxx

12-31-07
LAD D never replied so will send this last one
[email protected]

Dear melissa,

We are sorry that we have not heard from you and hope that you have not fallen ill or something tragic! You must still be on your prayer crusade and busy doing the lords work!
We have been blessed by a Mr. xxx xxxxx from Douala,
Littoral,Cameroon because he has a little monkey by the name of xxx. You would just fall in love with her. We wanted to go with you because of your faith with Christ, but could not hold out any longer. Mr. xxxx is asking $1,200.00 dollars for little xxx, which is way more than your offer, but we had no other option, but to accept because we have not heard from you in so long. We will be sending all of the money western union on Jan. 2 and hopefully little Lilly will be on the plane the next day and we will be waiting. We plan on having a big party for her at the house!
We wish you well and a happy new year,
With love,
xxx and Jxxx

{This should piss them off}

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 2:41 am

Gee....Wiz Guess LAD C had a bad day at the office and doesn't want to play anymore! [email protected] + [email protected]

Quote:

Stop wastin' your fuckin' time...i ain't no punk ass...so be careful !

Guess I'm not on this Christmas list anymore!
Guess I will throw his telehone away. +21279988595

Maybe one of his Macaws bit one of his f**kin fingers off!

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 11:16 am

Update:

12-30-07
LAD B
Hello xxx,

I haven't heard from you for a while now.Hope all is well with xxx.Please let me know if he is getting better and if you still have plans on getting xxx as before.

12-30-07
REPLY TO LAD B
Dear xxx,

Has been very troublesome on this side. I was just able to read your last e-mail and just about fell out of my chair when finding that you are in Cameroon!
God may have answered xxx and families prayers and little xxxy will have a new home in America!
My daughter is with the Peace Corps and stationed at Younde Bamenda, Cameroon! Is that near you? Her name is xxxx and she would be able to come over and check the paper work and look the monkey over and all. She is a nurse. Maybe you may know her, she is a white blond woman like you.
She will be coming back to the States for New Years party and xxx could come back with her! Please let me know soon if she can come to visit, OK?

God does work in mysterious ways.
God be with you,
xxx

{Note to self: Pet lads will never call you! Interesting see see how she reacts to this}

12-31-07
LAD B
Will try again

Dear xxx,
I have not heard from you and was wondering if you, Granny and little xxx are well? You have not sold xxxx to someone else, have you? Please let us know. Meeting with my daughter, xxxx, was only a thought but she may be to far from you anyway! If you want, we call still make plans on flying her over and that will not be a problem. A Mr. xxx xxx from Douala, Cameroon, has a little girl monkey by the name of xxxx and she is a little angel! He sent a picture to us. He wants $1,000.00 for her, but it may be worth it if you have already sold xxxx. If we have not heard from you by January 2, we will wire the money, by Western Union, to Mr. xxxx for little xxxx. We hope that you have no hard feelings about this and will miss having xxxx as our own, but I am just making xxx wish come true!
Have a happy new year and all love from the family,
xxx

{If this doesn't rattle her cage, nothing will!}

1-1-08
LAD B

xxx,
Happy New Year.I did sent you an e-mail and i still have xxx up for sale.I was waiting for the address and airport closed to you to arrange for her shipping.My Granny is getting better.Thanks to God,we offered her a prayer service and she is getting better now.I can get Little xxx shipped out Wednesday if you are ok and will be able to pick her up at the airport.We were also very busy with the New Year festivities and hope you enjoy this Coming year with Love,care.I pray xxx gets well soon so he can meet with xxx or possible be there to received her when she arrive.
All i need now to ship xxx to you are your full names,address,tel number with closet airport to your address.If you can get the info,then i will get the process going and will send you the papers tomorrow for you to see.
Hope to read from you soon.
xxxx.

{It comes alive....No talk about about letting my dear daughter come to check the monkey out...shy little lad...aren't we!}

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 5:28 pm

12-30-07
LAD A

Tell her to call me through this number +237 xxxxxx. Thats my contact phone number, i am presently in Bamenda and if she calls me, i will come and meet her in the Village. It will be my pleasure to meet her, so there will no problem to get the Monkey. Tell her that i am giving the baby Monkey for $500. If this is ok, i will expect her call as soon as possible.
Thanks.

12-30-07
LAD A

xxx,
This is GREAT news and thank you very much! Have some questions, how far did you travel to get there? Do you have place to stay? Will you have baby monkey with you when you meet with her and do you have travel cage she can buy for plane trip? Money will be no problem and she will have extra for you if you work well with her. How far are you from airport in case things won't work in Bamenda? Should be no problem, but need back up plan in case. Sorry for all questions, but need all this information because time is short my friend. I can't call her because store owner get mad. She has no cell phone and will call me from coin box tomorrow morning as planned. The line is nosy and hard to hear so need to plan out before hand because she leaves for America very soon.
One last thing and this is IMPORTANT, if you can send me picture of you and monkey so she can know you before meet. You must understand her fear in another country and being girl. She fears robbers in the village.Will try to call you later for assurance.

Care for her, my friend,

12-30-07
LAD A REPLIES

Sure it will be my pleasure to meet her, Just tell her to call me so that we can talk on the phone number, My contact phone number is +237 xxxxx. You yourself, i want you to call me, i tried calling you today but my calls were forwarded to the answering.
It took me just 5 hours drive from Douala-littoral to Bamenda. I am still in Bamenda and i came purposely so that i can get this baby to your daughter, i understand that she will love to see my pictures. Below are some attachments of me and the baby monkey xxxx. I am so excited to meet your daughter, Can you also send me some pictures of her? I want to see that person that i am going to meet before i get to her. I hope you understand.
I am coming along with a cage. Please do as much as you can to call me today so that we talk.
Thanks very much for everything.
xxxx is doing fine and she is so excited with me here, we are having a great time.

{He sent two pictures of a white blond haired man holding a monkey. Humm....no msgs on my VM}

12-30-07
LAD A

xxx,
Been trying to reach you all evening, but won't connect through! May be my Long distance carrier isn't working...not sure, but will call phone guy tomorrow. Wanted to get my daughters picture off to you quickly. I was using xxx's scanner but it was acting strangely, hope it worked correctly. My daughter is suppose to call me tomorrow soon. I will keep you posted and keep trying to reach you by phone.

Thanks, xxx
PS: Great pictures! xxxx looks real cute.

{10MEG dll file attached....have fun!}

{This looks promising and may have a future. I wonder what this lad really has for my daughter? Does anyone know what is required for a safari badge?}

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51

HAHAHA!!!! This is some funny shit! Thanks for being such a good brother in law. I am starting to come around a bit....I kinda fade in and out of coma. Right now I'm out(at least long enough to write this) and I have decided that I am going to see if one of these monkey salesmen can hook up a very wealthy teenage brat with a giraffe. Depending on how this goes, bro, we may very well have ourselves a safari. Uhoh....I feel the coma comin on...I'll write again when I wake u............
~sleep~

Posted: Sun Dec 30, 2007 6:51 pm

Dew.......Don't up and die on me bro, cuz I need you now! .....it would break sis's heart! Do you think your lad will be able to get that giraffe on a Boeing 707....make him get pictures for you! Waiting for LAD A to contact me. Hummm..maybe after no show, he will to meet her at airport.
Time is running out and he must need some cash to start the new year out right! Better yet....maybe he can hook up with LAD B, if she comes through, and they can fight over the money!

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51

I'll tell ya, I believe someone over there could hook me up with a unicorn. I am amazed at the wide variety of family pets available from Camroon. A giraffe is at least possible...right? I really would love to see a picture of one of these clowns getting my giraffe on a plane. But first, I just want to see what baby giraffes are available, a few pictures of, "Hand fed, very tame, good with other pets complete with all papers vet shotted wearing diapers..." giraffes would be funny enough to make me wet my pants.

I just can't believe the lengths these guys will go to.

Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 9:46 pm

Update

1-1-07
LAD B

Hello xxxx,

It's nice to hear that xxxx has not been sold yet. xxx has opened his eyes, but does not speak. I am sure he will be pleased if we can buy xxxx. My information per your request is as follows:

xxx xxxxxi
xx Taxxx St.
El Cxxx,Caxxxx, 9xxx (USA)
xxxxxxxxx
Airport: San Diego International
3225 N xxxxxxxxxxx, San Diego

Mr. xxxxx from Douala has already sent me his paper work (shot records, bill of health and letter from his pet doctor, picture, etc)of little xxx which I have just received! After I receive your paper work, I will take both to my pet doctor, and he will make the decision because she knows more about this then me.
Guess it may be around 10:00PM at night, Your time, so you may not see this until tomorrow, so hopefully sometime tomorrow afternoon, you can send back to me, if that is alright with you? It will then be sometime Wednesday that the final decision will be made.
Think you for making contact with me.

With joy to the world,

xxx

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51

Oh my gosh these people are unreal!!!Good work, Zapit, maybe we'll have our monkey soon? lol
By the way just wanted to let you know, I may have found my source for buying a giraffe! I'm not kidding. I didn't know if it would be too far fetched, evidently it's not, and now I will start working on maybe a rhino, or a wildabeast, ultimately, I hope to find a source for a unicorn. Keep it up Bro!
Dew

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 3:27 am

Well LAD B sends two more e-mails wanting to talk to me over the phone and saying she tried to call me and I don't answerer and BA...BA...BA, and wants me to call her! Even her hubby e-mails and wants me to call him on his cell phone....shit!....I just want you to send me some fake crap...alright? I'm not asking you to send over the monkey!
Enough is enough so I reply for the last time!

XXXX and XXXXX,

I have waited all day for you to send required documents that I requested yesterday, so I could have my pet doctor look at them, and all I receive is another e-mail wanting me to call more numbers and saying my phone does not work. I have had my cell phone with me at all times for the last 24 hours and not one phone call from you, and NO, I do not have voice mail or answering machine! If you would have sent me this information a week ago, like I had originally requested, then xxx would have had a new home in America. All I get from you is, �very busy with New Years festivities�! Well, xxx is in the hospital dying and I can't wait any longer!
Next time, when you sell a monkey to an American, and you are requested to send all pertinent information, I suggest that you send pictures, all required documentation(this means types of shots and dates, Pet doctor certificate stating that the monkey is in good health, and if the pet has ANY problems that need to be dealt with...etc..etc) and do this ALL in one e-mail attachment. Now...how hard would that be to do unless you do not have it? Please do not play �PHONE TAG� and say you are to busy doing �festivities�. Is that clear enough for you?
I have just sent $1,000.00 US dollars , via Western Union, to Mr. Rinxxxx in Dxxxla because he wishes to sell his money and not play games! Not one time did I ever have to call him, nor did he call me! I will be picking Little xxx up at the Airport in two days time.
I hope xxx finds a good home soon and that her owners wise up a bit!
xxx

Well Lad B and C are over with and LAD D got cold feet, or Smelt (as SC would put it) a rat, but Lad A is still hanging in there strong!

Otterfor had some change left on this calling card so decided to pitch in and help out a Yankee!
He has now become my beloved daughter. Chxxxie is in the Peace Corps and Lad A has the hots for him/her and is chasing her all over Baxxxda and Doxxla looking for her (we think!) and has a skinny little monkey with him. Anyway, he is one confused Lad right now, but doesn't know the half of it yet.

Posted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:36 pm

UPDATE:

Dad has personal problems right now, so he wants Lad A to work with daughter on this:

Hello XXX,
I hope my daughter has contacted you by now. You see...I have run into some personal family health issues that has fogged up my thinking at the moment,and need to be dealt with on this end. My daughter, my little sweetheart, said that she would handle the affairs about little xxxx and not to worry about it. She is just that way with dear old dad!
Be sure to keep track of your costs, in detail, with copies of receipts, travel locations, lodging and all because I want you to get exactly what you deserve. Be sure to keep me updated, but work out details with my xxx
Love, Cxxx

Cxxx gives �Detailed� driving instructions on how to find her!

Hello, Mr. xxx!

Oh, what a day! We spent most of the day celebrating the New Year, and it was a chance to let our hair down and relax and party! It was really good, I never thought that I could have that much fun out here. No offense to your town, please note! But stuck in the camp here is usually dull and uninteresting. Except for today! It was crazy! LOL!!!
Anyway, I got a picture of you and xxx that dad sent to me. She's so sweet! I love her already and I haven't even met her for real! And I have to say, the guy holding her is not bad, either. Hehe! Sorry... if you have a wife or a gf, please don't let her read this! Smile

I'm not sure what sort of address you want from me. Everyone in town knows the Peace Corps place here, and our mail gets sent to us okay if it's just addressed to "PERSON'S NAME, P.C. Camp, Bxxa, Cameroon" I guess that's not too good for your purposes, huh? Well, we're about 1 miles north on the xxx road, you know the road that goes right around the town? Well, you leave the town headed west and then get onto that road and then travel clockwise, which I guess means turning north when you hit the ring road, and travel for about a mile. There's just like a dirt track at first, it's real easy to miss it, about a mile along, as I say, and then if you follow that it turns into a proper paved road after about a half mile, then just follow that till you reach the gates on the right. You can't miss us, the road leads past us and you don't have to turn off anywhere until you see our place. I hope this makes some sense to you. I'm useless at directions. Yeah, typical blonde woman, I know, couldn't read a map to save her life! LOL!
Sorry about being flippant about this...... I'm still a little tipsy from the beers we've been drinking. I've been giggling like a schoolgirl all afternoon, but it's been fun! I hope you can make some sense from my silly description of where we are. I'll probably sober up properly tomorrow and read back this message and feel SO embarrassed. Sorry.

Welllll, okay, I'll go now because it's late and they want to lock up the computer room. The night's still young for us party-people, though! HAHA!

Give xxx some special attention and tell her that her new mommy is waiting for her eagerly and will be seeing her VERY VERY VERY soon. Okay?
Thanks!

LAD A is confused!

Good morning Cxxx,
Is really nice reading from you. Happy new year to you all in your camp. I can see that you guys really had much fun out there. Ccxxx, i still can not make out with the description of the Peace Corps place.
I dont know if that place really have a name as other places here. It will have a sub name. I mean the district area. Are you in Bxxxa? If so what part of Bxxxa, i mean the name of the neighborhood.
Everywhere in Bxxxxa has a name. And there are too much camps here in Bxxxxa. I need you to make me understand everything. I am getting confuse with your precise location. Get back to me again and ask any native around and they will give you the right name of where your camp in situated in Bxxxa.
Hope to read from you soon.

Cxxx has hang over, but wants to make sure that LAD A has got it right!

Hello Mr. xxxx,

My head hurts really bad this morning... I shouldn't have had all those drinks yesterday. The sun's too bright, the stupid birds in the trees are too loud, the eggs are too greasy... ugh, I'm going straight back to bed after I've written this email. I'm glad I've got a few days off, a chance to recover from yesterday.
How are you, Mr. xxx? I hope you had a good time celebrating the New Year, and I hope you don't feel as hungover as I do. Never again, Mr. xxx, never again, it's just not worth it.
Yeah, I read my directions that I wrote yesterday. What the heck was I thinking, huh? I was all over the place, I know. Sorry about that.
Most of what I wrote was right, just not very specific, too vague to be any use. What you need to do is what I said in my last mail, but get on the ring road and make as if you were heading for Mxxxxi. The little turn-off that leads to our place is the road just before Mxxxxi, there's like a handpainted sign that someone put up that looks like it's pointing down a horrible little dirt track, but really that dirt track only lasts for about a half mile and then you get some proper pavement and it's a better ride. Sometimes, the people who bring our supplies in say that the sign is missing and I guess it's kids messing about, so someone has to go and put up another one or whatever. Oh! Make sure you don't mistake our turnoff for the road that leads you back to Mxxxxn. That's going in the wrong direction, as you probably know, and you'll get even more lost if you accidentally go down that way! I know because my taxi driver when I first came here went down that way by mistake and it took us hours, literally HOURS, to get back to the right area. I was close to tears with frustration because our directions just didn't make sense because we were nowhere near the right place.
I hope this makes more sense to you than yesterday's attempt.
How's xxxx? I hope she's fine. I never asked... what does she normally eat? Can I feed her, like, regular food and stuff, or does she have to eat special monkey food? Let me know, okay? I want to look after her real well and make sure she's the happiest and healthiest little monkey in the world.
Okay, I've written enough and my head is pounding and I just want to go back to bed and sleep off this hangover. I'll end now, okay. I hope my directions make sense, and I hope to see you when you get here soon.
Oh! Later, I'll look for a photo of me so you know who I am. I've got one lying around somewhere and I need to scan it in and then I'll send it to you, okay?
Bye for now.

Love, Cxxxx

LAD A Still confussed and replies:

Hello Cxxxx,
Are you telling me that you are in Mxxxxi, cos i know that place. So i will follow the road to Mxxxxi. I don't know but i am getting more and more confuse with your description, please i don't know if it is possible for you to come and meet me in Mxxxxxxn, Bamenda central town. There i think that we can do things better than me coming over to some where that i don't really know.
If ok to come and meet me, then i will prefer that we meet at the Bamxxnda Proxxncial Hospital which is near the mobile police unit. There we can get to see each other. I will prefer that you meet me there and is near the Police Station called XXX.
Come there and there will be no problem for you to meet me. My contact phone number is xxxx. I will email you dad so that he knows about this.
I want you to have this baby Monkey as soon as possible.
Have a nice day.
Regards.

LAD A has had it with this spaced out chick and decides to e-mail dad and request WU money!

Hello xxxx,
I have had a great time chatting with your daughter online, she seems very busy but she is not giving me a clear description of where exactly she is located. I dont know but i just told her to come meet me instead of me going to somewhere that i dont really know. I told her to come and meet me at the Police Station in Bamenda town. There it will be better for us to chat things in regard of baby xxxx.

You have to understand that i am coming all the way from the economic capital and there i have many things doing. I have forgone many things just because i want to give a good home for my baby Monkey. It took me close to 7 hours from where i am to Bamenda, i will have preferred that you pay half of the money so that i ship her from Cameroon to the closest airport in your locality and when she gets there, you then finish the rest payment.
I understand that you are ready to give xxxx a good home and i am also very ready to give her to you. So if you pay$250 now to me via Western Union, i will ship her directly to you. I want this to be done as soon as possible so that i can proceed with other things back in my own city.

If ok, then the meeting between me and your daughter should hold on so that i go back to the my city where there is an international airport and ship xxx to you.
Thanks very much and hope to read from you soon.
Call me anytime if you want to talk to me. +237 xxxx.
Happy new year.

Good old worn out dad replies to LAD A and cries and fusses some more!

Hello xxxx,
Managed to finally check my e-mail after 4 days on the road. You think you have been traveling far lately!! I have covered about 3000 miles in three days! I think you call that 4,828 Kilometers, or something like that, in your country. Anyway, with my brother-in-law being in a coma and now my son has just been in a serious car accident and I don't know how much more of this I can take right now! I have not told Cxxxx about this yet, because I do not want to upset her anymore then what she is already now. In my last phone call with her recently, she sounded disturbed and unsettled. Something about leaving, or being transferred and that the airport was so far away and all. I didn't understand it clearly because the line was so noisy and all. I wish you two could have hooked up, but life can be unkind sometimes. You said that you have, "many things doing" back home. You mean you work many jobs? Where is it exactly that you live? I don't know why, but I was thinking Doxxla, but that's not 7 hours away anyway, is it? Well I don't know why I am asking all of these question any way because it not my business. When I get tired, my mind wonders and I talk rubbish sometimes.
You need to forgive my daughter when it comes to giving instructions because she gets mixed up sometimes, as you already know.
Well I must rest now. I am sure my daughter will figure something out xxx and all.
Take care my friend and safe travels,
xxx

Ch..... needs up uplift xxx spirits and make that "special connection".

Hello Mr. xxx!

It's Chxxx again. I'm feeling better today but I had lots of stuff to do because now it's my day off and it's the only chance I get to do things for myself.
Yes, I read your message about meeting in the centre of Baxxnda. Is that really what you want to do? I don't want to, I have to tell you. I mean, if that's the only thing that will work, then...... okay. But I would prefer not to cos there's no way I'm going into the town on my own (it's a really long walk!) or I'll have to wait for someone else taking a car or a van in, and I don't know when that will happen. Anyway, are you sure you don't want to come here? You've got it almost right, anyway, but the only bit wrong was you don't want to be going to Mbxxxxi. We're very near but if you get to Mbxxxi then you've missed the turn-off point that leads to us and then you'll never find us. Right.... you're going along the road to Mbxxxi, okay? But when you get to about a mile or maybe a little less before Mxxxi you should start looking for our little dirt track on the right and with any luck there's also our sign pointing down the track. That's where you want to make a left and you'll reach us. DON'T GO ALL THE WAY TO MBxxxI, MR. XXX! Cos then you will not find us, we are before that place. Do you see now?
Okay, maybe if I write more it will just make you more confused.
Oh! Also, Mr. xxxr, you will have to hurry because my time here is almost up. I only signed on for this place for one year, and that's almost up for me, see? So you'll have to make sure we meet very soon. Please try, I am missing Lilly and I look at the picture you sent all the time (I printed it off and keep it with me!).
And also I scanned in that picture I told you about. I have attached it, okay? That's me standing at the front and teaching the people here. I teach them biology and I hope you don't mind me saying this but I teach them sex education. Like, how to do it safely and make sure they don't get diseases and also to stop unwanted pregnancies. I don't feel embarrassed when I teach it to people cos that's my job and it's just work, you know?
Anyway, I hope that picture is okay. I might try to look for another one that shows me better, but no promises!
You never answered my question, Mr. xxxr, about what Lilly eats. I want to be prepared for when she comes here, so getting the right food is really important, isn't it? Just let me know what you feed her and I will make sure I have whatever it is, okay?
Tomorrow, I am back to doing camp duties, and also I will find out when I am shipping out from here. I don't want to leave, but I have to because that's my contract, see? Also, I don't want to leave until I have xxxy with me! Please do your best to get here, Mr. xxx. I don't know what I'll do if I can't get my cute little monkey and I have to fly back home without her.
Take care, Mr. xxx, and I will check my email tomorrow to see what arrangements you have made.
Bye!

love,
Chxxxe

LAD A replies:
ok I will be on my way yomorrrow and see if I can get the right direction. My contact phine number is xxxxx

OK....Chxxxx touches base with xxxx to make sure that things go well!

Hello Mr. xxxx!
Chxxxx here.
I got your email and I will be looking out for you. When you get here, just ask for me by name, everyone who works here knows me. LOL! Not in that way, though! :blush: I mean, they know who I am and they will be able to point you towards wherever I am. If it's before 6pm today, then I will be teaching in the school building. It's the low building on the right just past the pen where they keep the goats. There are signs all over the place so it's easy to find, anyway.
If I'm taking a class when you arrive, there's the teachers' room you can sit in... it has all the comfy chairs! And if you're lucky, there'll be some food and stuff still out on the table. Just have a seat there and when I'm finished I'll go there to see if you have arrived. Or else if it's past 6, then I'll probably be having dinner or most likely back in my own quarters. Anyway, just ask someone when you get there, and I'm sure they'll guide you to the right place.
I can't wait to see xxxx!
I'm still curious about what to feed her, though. I'll have to get some stuff for her, won't I? Or does she eat whatever is around at the time? That doesn't sound healthy, but then I'm not a monkey doctor, so what do I know, huh? Please, please, please, if you get this email before you leave, let me know what to feed xxxx.
Thanks.

love,
Chxxxx

Gee...Wizz What happen to LAD A, did he get lost again! Chxxx fires off another e-mail!

Hello Mr. xxxx,

I waited for you after my classes but I didn't see anyone who looked like you at all wandering around here and I asked a few people and they said no one had come asking me, as far as they know. I guess you couldn't find us after all? I hope you weren't too angry at my useless directions. Sad

I'm really sad now, I was looking forward to seeing you and xxx and getting this business sorted out.
What shall we do now? I might ask around and see if anyone is going into central Baxxxxa next week and then I can email you the day and time, and you will have lots of warning so you can be there waiting for me. Does this sound okay to you? I think it's the best plan we have right now.
And remember to tell me about Lilly's food! I don't want her getting sick because I'm feeding her wrong stuff.
I look forward to your reply!I'll check my email tonight, just before they lock up the computer room, okay?

love,
Chxxxx

Humm....Lad A has way to much time on his hands and is having to much fun traveling and such ,so I decided to bait him again from another account. I am going to try a new role that I haven't done in the past. I'm taking a chance on this and hope his BS flag doesn't go up! No more spell checker for me and it makes it so much for faster, kinda nice!

To LAD A(1)
Hello,
Is your Capuchin monkey still for sell? I found the advertisment on line, but it is a couple weeks old.If you do,please contact me because I am interested.
Thanks, Wxx Wxxxa

LAD A(1)fires reply right back. Same crap as the first one.

Thanks for getting back to me in regard of my baby Capuchin monkey. Her name is xxxxy, she is still available and i am looking for a good home that will take good care of her. My baby has been with me since birth and now i need a good home for her. I will give her to you if you will promise to take good care of her. She is now 4months old and lives in doors and also sits and watch TV with us in our family. Lxxx has been the perfect baby companion since birth. With all this qualities, one can say that she is very good with other animals. She is sociable with kids and others.
If interested to have Lilly, all you need to do is get back to me with some more information about you.
I will be glad to read from you soon.
Thanks.

OK...Let's keep him busy! Reply back to LAD A(1)

Thank you for fast call back! Your ad has been posted 4 some time now and hope something is not wrong with monky. I am looking for frined and helper. Are you in ohio like ad say. I am dihabled vertern from war time. I was near DUI bomb when it exploded and now I head damage and forget words and stuff like that and can not walk anymore. Hope you do not look down on me cause of this.
Government gives me money and have helper from government office so do not sorry cos I can pay for monky ok.
Can you send me pic of you family with little monky so I can look. Government heper says I can train monky to change channels and stuff. You said monkdy watchs tv with you and family so this make me excited cus I can not do myself.
Plz let me know soon ok.
Think u
Wxx wxxxx

UPDATE: Dad and Chxxxie worried!
1-8-08 (7:00PM his time)

NXXX,
I am worried! My daughter called me crying and all upset! She is worried about you and the monkey because you stopped writing and calling! She thinks that the robbers have killed you and everything. She wants to call the town police, but I told her to wait and I would try to contact you! We hope nothing has happened to you!
Please contact me or CXXXe as soon as you can, OK?

Worried friends,
XXX

{Note: Just found out that his yahoo account got axed! This lad has been up to no good...and to think I was his first...I feel so dirty! Maybe we'll give him a buzz later then he's counten his sheep...errr...monkey's that is}

Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 3:30 am

These people claim to be in the Cameroons, yet their English is very good methinks. I'd suspect that they are more likely to live in a genuinely English speaking country. Would it not be possible to publish the e-mail address(es) of these idiots? Maybe we could blitz them with enquiries of their pets and really piss 'em off as each sale fell through. Laughing

Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 5:02 am

Bigglesworth...check your PM.

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 5:31 pm

Dew wrote:

ultimately, I hope to find a source for a unicorn. Keep it up Bro!
Dew

May I steal your idea? I wanna unicorn of my very own.

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 5:41 pm

Ask Dew.....I'm sure he won't mind. Also request picture...that will keep the lad busy!

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 5:48 pm

Zapit wrote:

request picture

If the lad is creative and decides to stick a paper horn on a goat, that will be the best trophy ever.

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 9:51 pm

I'm hoping for something of a sort. Not to mention a certificate from the Unicorn Fancier's Association.

Of course, first I have to find a pet scammer.

Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 9:59 pm

I've always wanted a pet alligator. I want a trained one though. I need pics to prove that you can stick your head in its mouth and he won't bite it off. Idea

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51

Chain Yanker,
all I would require is that you post the picture of the unicorn you get, and tell me where to find it. I'll piss myself laughing.
...not that I enjoy pissing myself, well, (awkward moment) ...anyway, what I mean is, that'd be pretty funny.

Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 5:43 pm

Have no fear on that score. If I get a unicorn pic, I'm going to post it everywhere I can.

Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 11:10 pm

Wow, I can't wait! These pet scammers never fail to entertain me! Oh the wonderously wonderfully wonderful things they and their pets can do!

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 4:20 pm

Well....LAD A got his Yahoo account axed and has dropped off the face of the earth so things don't look promising! Still hoping he will come around. Cherrie (my daughter ) is in tears.

Not quite a Newb Joined: 27 Dec 2007 Posts: 51

LOL!!!!!

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 6:09 pm

^^ And he's made no effort to re-establish contact with Cherrie (I was playing her for Zapit). Which is more proof that shutting down email accounts is an inconvenience to everyone but the lad himself.
What's probably happened (I guess) is that he has recontacted the victims that were looking like they were going to be barely any effort to scam (Cherrie had him looking for a non-existent Peace Corps camp in Cameroon), and dropped the troublesome ones because this has made him reassess his current batch of marks.
Grr, etc.

Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 1:42 am

Are you sure Lad A got his account axed Zapit? Could it be simply that he has decided to ignore the people he thinks are playing games with him? Or did you get notification of inability to deliver?

You sent me his e-mail address. Maybe I should try sending him an e-mail? Where could I have gotten his address from? Suggestions anyone?

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