Cursed by the FBI!!!! (Now: Disgraced)

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lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Oh, this one is great siggy material. I couldn't stop laughing....

Quote:

Your delivery has been stopped and cancelled. Any further email we shall report you to FBI for attempt of commonizing and curses.

Your parcel is been return back to the lottery board. Have a nice day.

I wonder what I could have said to upset him so..... Shocked

I must admit that I do not quite know how to respond.

Master Baiter Joined: 31 Oct 2007 Posts: 130

They can't be too upset, they did say "have a nice day"

Master Baiter Joined: 03 Jul 2007 Posts: 158

You are being reported to the FBI for being common and cursing Shocked

I'd best be watching me p's and q's, me thinks.

Laughing

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Not sure if I'm being cursed by the FBI or being reported for cursing. Wink

Since I didn't curse at him I assume he means I am under Mr Mueller's wicked spell. Twisted Evil

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:26 am

At least it was only for "attempt of commonizing". It's not like you got caught in the act of commonizing or something awful like that.

Besides, curses, you didn't really have anything in common, so have a nice day!

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:20 am

"[A]ttempt of commonising" couldn't have something to do with being a Communist, could it? For some people the Cold War never ended...

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:08 pm

Hey, attempted commonizing is just as bad as actual, caught red-handed commonizing. It's a premedicated act, bad enough alone, without the curses rap thrown in. You're looking at 12 to 15 minimum. I'd beg him not to report me, and send him a moneygram or something if I were you.

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 1:56 pm

^^^^. I agree. You could find yourself in a commonizing position.

Write back to the lad, and assure him that you are serious about claiming your winnings. Don't forget to tell him that "time is not on our side".

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

Looks like I've been given one more chance:

George Herman Ruth (me)
Wac0tt M00re of Global Fast Way Delivery Courier (scammer)

This is how you treat your customers? You report them to the FBI for asking questions?

George Herman Ruth

Dear George Herman Ruth,

Your case is quite similar to two winners who took their winnings unserious and later disturb our lottery company and more. So we do not want that to happen. You were reported to us by the courier company that was suppose to deliver your winnings but along the line you acted strange to the courier and as you don't know, Global Fast Way Delivery Courier is the leading courier company here in UK and they are very happy with their customers unless the customer is not sure of what service he/she needs.

You were suppose to have your parcel deliver to you but you did not make use of the chance you got. I tried calling you today to let you know that your parcel was received this morning here in my office. Next time make use of the chance you got and ask no much questions and as i have said if you want your parcel back, write a letter of appology to Global Fast Way Delivery Courier and tell them you are sorry for the act and you want them to go and pick your parcel and delivetr it to you. GREETINGS TO YOU.

I will wait and if after a 4 days, the courier did not come, I will sign on the the parcel retain form. Just 4 days and you should let me know when you have done that.

Regards
Wac0tt M00re

Gee Whiz, do you think I should "disturb" this company again?

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:23 pm

Parcel? What is this parcel anyway?? Confused

Is this a lottery, or a raffle?
Don't go acting strange to the courier, now. Laughing

I reckon you can forego the apology because the board has forgiven you for commonizing, and just start demanding that parcel.

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:32 pm

I presume that this is a lotto bait that you're doing?

You could grovel and write that letter of apology, but I have mixed feelings about groveling. The batier should always be in control, yet the baiter has to throw the lad a few bones every now and then. If you do write that letter, your bait will no doubt continue. He will think he has a real victim on his hands.

Then after your apology is accepted, you can disturb them with more questions. Not right away though. That'll come when you tell him you don't know how Western Union works.

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

^^^ Yes, it's a lotto scam bait. As a personal rule, I never grovel, Cool

but that's just me. I do sometimes "apologize," though. I think I will write back to thank him for giving me another chance and promise not to ask any more silly questions. That should get him to think he has the scam back on track. Of course, then I will ask him some "seriouse" questions. After all, silliness is in the eye of the beholder, right?

Anyway, I have a suspicion he's in for a nasty surprise. I e-mailed the host for his fake courier website with a complaint and samples of his e-mails using the URL. I did receive a "thank you" acknowledgment and I suspect they will be taking it down shortly. No, doubt our friend will figure out who the culprit is. Twisted Evil

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:53 pm

bunnyrabbit's lad wrote:

Global Fast Way Delivery Courier is the leading courier company here in UK

Very true. I can hardly drive anywhere here without seeing Global Fast Way Delivery Courier vans and bikes and cars clogging up the roads.

bunnyrabbit's lad wrote:

and they are very happy with their customers unless the customer is not sure of what service he/she needs.

Sounds very insecure. Is he sure he isn't talking about an ex-girlfriend now?

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:05 pm

bunnyrabbit wrote:

Your case is quite similar to two winners who took their winnings unserious and later disturb our lottery company and more.

Sounds like he's been baited a few times! And who wouldn't, this guy is shaping up to be a barrel of fun! Very Happy

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:05 pm

bunnyrabbit wrote:

As a personal rule, I never grovel, Cool

but that's just me. I do sometimes "apologize," though.

"Grovel" was perhaps the wrong word, but I think you got the gist of it. I've had to apologize as well, but only to the extent necessary to keep the bait in commission.

Generally, I look for something that the lad offers up that I can use against him. In one bait I asked for advice on what to tell the (fictitious) bank manager at my end what the money I needed was for. The lad then said "tell the manager that you need the money to buy a boat". Then I came back with "the manager doesn't believe me and he's refusing to release the funds". That added two weeks to my bait!

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

@Barry, There is nothing wrong with groveling. A lot baiters do it and it probably adds longevity to their baits. It just goes against my grain. Wink

Yes, finding something he said to use against him is the key. Smile

BTW -- what does "Engr." in "Engr. Wac0tt S. M00re" stand for, "engineer?" At a courier company? Probably assumes it is a title of respect like "Rev. Father."

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 6:13 pm

^^^ Engineer.

In real life I am an engineer, though not with the NNPC as my profile states.

I used to get a lot of "Barry Kelly" letters in my catcher account, where he was killed several times on the Sagbama Expressway, so I took his name when I came here.

Last I heard, Barry Kelly died in the 2004 tsunami.

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 6:15 pm

Quote:

BTW -- what does "Engr." in "Engr. Wac0tt S. M00re" stand for, "engineer?" At a courier company? Probably assumes it is a title of respect like "Rev. Father."

Yes you Commonist, it means Engineer. In Nigeria the title used to mean you'd risen in status by working for an oil company. Now it's cheap; everyone is an Engineer, just like everyone who works in a US bank is probably a vice-president of something or other.

Nigerians really are "title-crazy." See this post from the NigeriaWorld forum:
http://nigeriaworld.com/board/viewtopic.php?p=25669&sid=38a2120e42ab098843a52764e4995c08

I've gotten a lot of mileage from a baiting char styled as

Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 6:43 pm

Just tell him you sent the letter of apology, or attach a large DLL renamed as "apology.doc" and say you'll be going away for Christmas in a few days. If this transaction isn't completed before then, you won't be able to complete it at all. If he says he didn't get the letter of apology (which he doesn't give a shit about anyway) you can slap him for losing it.

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

^^^ I like that. That's good. Very Happy

I'll also promise not to ask any more silly questions. But then, my "seriouse" questions might sound a little silly to some. Wink

Not quite a Newb Joined: 12 Nov 2007 Posts: 74

It certainly sounds as if he is not happy at all bunnyrabbit!

Centaur76

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

I send a "letter of apology" -- really just 12 MB of junk and it seems I am back in their good graces:

George Herman Ruth (me)
Engineer Williams (scammer)

Dear Engineer,

This is my letter of apology for asking silly questions. I promise not to ask silly questions now. Please send me my consignment prize winnings.

George Herman Ruth

12 MB of junk attached as Apology.doc

Good day,

We are in receipt of your message of appology and we do sincerely accept it in our heart and welcome you once more to our certified courier company. As a leading courier company here in UK, we do all best to make sure that our customers are ok with our services. It is my honour to let you know that you letter of appology is been received and granted.

A note has been sent to the Lottery board today for parcel recall for delivery are the parcel is still untouched. We shall deliver it to you shortly. For questions or comments please call us with our telephone number above. Welcome once again to our qualify services.

Have a nice day.

Regards,

Engr. Matthew S. W1ll1ams.
Managing Director,
Global Fast Way Delivery Courier!

lost in translation Joined: 08 Aug 2007 Posts: 531

The other foot just fell:

Quote:

Dear George Herman Ruth,

This is to inform you that your parcel delivery is now available again and this time we hope the delivery will be done. George Herman Ruth, you have not yet make the delivery payment for your parcel before or now. Your parcel delivery is available again in our courier company but we have found out that you have not yet make the delivery charges payment before or now, so we can not dispatch your parcel unless you make the delivery payment. We will be able to deliver your registered parcel if the delivery payment is made. All the same, you are required to make the payment of your parcel delivery of �750.00 British Pounds to enable us deliver your parcel. Because without this payment we can not further the dispatch of your registered parcel.

The delivery payment of �750.00 British Pounds should be paid to the courier with the account department payment informations below. You should endeavour to make the delivery payment of �750.00 British Pounds, so that your registered parcel will be deliver to you shortly. Moreover, remittance is to be made by Western Union Money Transfer with the account department payment receiving informations below and as soon as the payment is confirm, your parcel will be dispatch immediately. Your parcel is available for delivery but we can not deliver it unless you make the delivery payment available to us. You are to use the below courier "Account Department" payment receiving informations below to make the delivery payment by Western Union Money Transfer.

Please find the remittance (Account Department) informations below:
Receiver's Names: = Engr. James T. Fedrick
Receiver's Address: = Unit 7, James Brown Close
Receiver's State/City: = London
Receiver's Country: = United Kingdom
Amount to Payment: = �750.00 British Pounds

Nevertheless, Western Union Money Transfer is our preferred means of receiving any payment and it is less cumbersome and faster for customers. If you insist on paying via this means in order for us to deliver your registered parcel, go to any of the nearest Western Union Money Transfer office and make the Delivery Payment of �750.00 British Pounds. You are to keep all informations confidential until your parcel is delivered to you. Your parcel will be deliver to you soon if you make the delivery payment on time.

Lastly, you are to send to us the Western Union Money Transfer payment receipt by scanning and sending it via the same email, so that the "Account Deparment Manager" can be able to confirm your payment and when confirm, immediately your parcel will be deliver to you.

Have a nice day.

Yours In Service,

Engr. Matthew S. Williams.
Managing Director,
Global Fast Way Delivery Courier!

Should I:

(A) claim that of course I already paid him and accuse him of scamming me, or

(B) ask him what is Western Union....?

Master Baiter Joined: 03 Jul 2007 Posts: 158

Lets go with Option B! Thats far more time consuming! You can dumb it for quite some time. Questions about what and and how for many an email, followed by wrong forms, mistakes... WU ignorant can make a very long process and a very frustrated lad.

Posted: Thu Dec 20, 2007 9:31 am

Why is the receiver an engineer? Perhaps he works for the lottery, and they're letting him have your processing fees as his christmas bonus or something. I expect he's the man who looks after those machines that select the winning numbers. Or something. Eh.

Glad to hear they accepted 12mb of random crud as an apology anyway. Very easy going people at the lottery HQ. Smile

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